Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed , rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantage of being self- employed?

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The number of
individuals
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being self-employed has increased because many
individuals
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find many advantages in it, e.g. more freedom and a positive
work
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environment
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.
While
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there are still some drawbacks, which are financial instability and a decrease in socialisation. There are a few advantages of being self-employed.
To begin
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, more freedom,
this
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can relate to when the people can schedule their
work
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timetable themselves, what time they would like to start or how many hours of
work
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they would like to do on that day.
Also
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,
this
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gives them the opportunity to
work
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from wherever they would like. They are not required to go to the office.
In addition
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,
this
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also
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allows people to create their own positive
work
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environment
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. There are many workers suffering from toxic
work
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surroundings,
for example
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, a biased management level or a selfish colleague. These create unfairness and unproductivity for those who
work
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in that
environment
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for a
while
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.
For instance
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, some workers get bullied about their appearance by their colleagues.
On the other hand
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, there are
also
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disadvantages to being self-employed.
Firstly
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,
individuals
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can face financial instability,
while
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working for a company or organisation guarantees a salary.
This
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group of
individuals
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might have freelance jobs, whose income depends on how many jobs they do.
As a result
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,
this
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causes a risk to their financial status.
For instance
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, in Thailand, many
individuals
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resign from the company
,
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apply
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and sell clothes or skincare products on TikTok, which is hard to forecast how much they will earn each day.
Next,
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it decreases their socialisation because working in the office encourages workers to
work
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as a team and to communicate with each other. So, if they
work
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for themselves, it might weaken
this
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skill, as they mostly spend time by themselves.
For example
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, some people might feel unconfident to
work
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with others after a long time of being self-employed. In conclusion, being self-employed can be positive in the form of freedom and a positive
work
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environment
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.
In contrast
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, it
also
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has some drawbacks
;
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:
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financial instability and a decrease in socialisation.

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task response
Answer both parts more fully. You say why people choose this way of work and give bad points, but some ideas could be more deeply explained.
coherence and cohesion
Make each main idea very clear at the start of the paragraph. One short topic sentence can help the reader follow your point.
coherence and cohesion
Link some ideas more smoothly. At times, the jump from one sentence to the next feels a bit sudden.
task response
Use examples that are more general or better explained. Some examples are good, but a few feel too quick.
coherence and cohesion
Check paragraph opening lines. For example, 'To begin, more freedom' is not a full clear sentence.
task response
You answer both questions in the task and keep to the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task response
You give real examples to support your ideas, which helps the reader.
coherence and cohesion
The contrast between good and bad sides is easy to see.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • autonomy
  • entrepreneur
  • independence
  • opportunity
  • financial stability
  • set your own schedule
  • pursue your dreams
  • take risks
  • uncertainty
  • income stability
  • workload
  • taxes
  • marketing
  • client acquisition
  • job security
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