Some university students want to learn about other subjects, in addition to their main subjects. All these believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these wheels and give your own opinion.

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In the modern world, it is undeniable that university
students
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face important decisions about how to organise their studies. Some believe that
students
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should explore additional
subjects
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beyond their main field,
while
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others argue that they should focus entirely on their core qualification. In
this
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essay, an attempt will be made to examine both perspectives. Those who support learning additional
subjects
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provide some reasons to justify their view. One of the most apparent benefits is that studying a variety of
subjects
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broadens
knowledge
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and develops diverse
skills
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. To illustrate, exposure to different disciplines can improve creativity, critical thinking, and adaptability.
For instance
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, a student studying business may benefit from learning psychology or communication
skills
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, which can enhance their future career opportunities.
In addition
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, having a wider academic background can help individuals adapt to changing job markets where multiple
skills
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are increasingly valuable. Those who disagree with the above idea
also
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have some points that should not be overlooked. One major reason is that focusing on a main subject allows
students
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to develop deeper expertise. To clarify, university education often requires intensive study and specialisation, which may be difficult to achieve if attention is divided.
For example
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,
students
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in fields
such
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as medicine or engineering need to dedicate significant time to mastering complex
knowledge
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and
skills
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. Dividing attention between multiple
subjects
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may reduce academic performance and limit professional competence. To recapitulate, it is evident that studying additional
subjects
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can broaden
skills
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and
knowledge
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,
while
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focusing on a main subject allows for deeper expertise. Having considered both sides thoroughly, I have personally come to believe that a balanced approach is the most effective, as
students
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should prioritise their main field
while
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also
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gaining basic
knowledge
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from other areas to enhance their
overall
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development.

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task response
Write your opinion more clearly in the introduction, not only in the end.
task response
Add one or two more specific examples to make your ideas stronger.
task response
Some ideas are good, but you can explain them a little more deeply.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow because each paragraph has a clear job.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words carefully. You use them well, but a few sound a bit formal and fixed.
coherence and cohesion
Try to connect example and main idea even more directly in each body paragraph.
task response
You answered both views and gave your own opinion.
task response
Your main ideas are clear and stay on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are in a good order, so the reader can follow your ideas easily.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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