IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people think that university students should focus only on their main subjects, while others believe they should also study other subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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There is no doubt that universities play an essential role in our lives. Some people believe that
students
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 should focus only on their main
subjects
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,
while
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 others think they should
also
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 study additional
subjects
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. In my opinion, studying both main and other
subjects
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 is more beneficial because it helps
students
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 develop a wider range of skills. On the one hand , numerous individuals believe that
student
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students
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 should focus
in
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on
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 the main
subjects
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 because
this
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 helps them to avoid distraction and take deper knoweldege intheir field.
For instance
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, medical
students
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 need to spend more time learning Biolegy and biomedical
subjects
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 to become more professionals.
On the other hand
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, a large number of people argue that
students
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 studying other
subjects
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become
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becomes
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 more beneficial for learners because
this
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 can help them to reduce stress and to escape from the academic routine,
for example
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,doing a activeties
such
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 as
competetion
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competition
 in football or basketball can create a
competetive
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competitive
 atmosphere and that
assist
Correct subject-verb agreement
assists
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 them to relax and enjoy their time. In conclusion,
although
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 some people believe that
students
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 should focus only on their main
subjects
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, I believe that studying both main and additional
subjects
Use synonyms
 is more beneficial because it helps them gain wider knowledge and develop important skills for their future.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. Say why each side is good or bad in a clear way.
task response
Give one more clear example for each main idea.
task response
Make your opinion very clear in the body, not only in the intro and end.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like on the one hand, on the other hand, for example, and because.
coherence and cohesion
Check that each sentence connects well to the next one.
task response
You answered both views and gave your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You used some examples to support your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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