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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table below shows the number of international students from different countriesin the USA and Canada in March 2002 and April 2004.

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The table illustrates the changes in the
number
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 of international
students
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 who come from four countries to the
USA
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 and
Canada
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 in March 2002 and April 2004. It is noticed that the total
number
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 of migrated
students
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 to
Canada
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 increased between March 2002 and April 2004,
whereas
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 the total
number
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 of migrated
students
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 to the
USA
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 decreased during the same
period
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. Meanwhile, for the comparison of these two years, the
percentage
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 of
change
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 in
students
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 migrated from China to
Canada
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 was the
majority
Correct word choice
highest
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,
while
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 the
percentage
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 of
change
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 in international
students
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 from India to the
USA
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is
Wrong verb form
was
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 the lowest. From the left part of
this
Linking Words
 table,
it is clear that
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 the total
number
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 of migrated
students
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 to
Canada
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 increased from 59,870 in March 2002 to 70,004 in April 2000, which
that
Verb problem
is a
show examples
change
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percentage
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 was 17%. During
this
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period
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, the
number
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 of migrated
students
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 from China, the
USA
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 and India to
Canada
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 increased, and the
percentage
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 of
change
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 in these 3 migration situations was 45%, 9% and 35%, respectively.
On the other hand
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,
although
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 the total
number
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 of migrated
students
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 to the
USA
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 decreased from 581,600 to 570,000 during the same
period
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, the
number
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 of migrated
students
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 from
Canada
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 and China to the
USA
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 rose, the
change
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 was 6% and 7% separately. Apart from that, the
change
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 of people who travelled from India to the
USA
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 was lowest, -9% during
this
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period
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.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, students, usa, canada, period, percentage, change with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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