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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In the future nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? write atleast 250 words

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In
the
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apply
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recent years, it is widely expected that physical
books
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 and newspapers will
come to an
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become
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 extinct as
people
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 will prefer
E-
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books
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 and E-newspapers rather than the old traditional
books
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.
While
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 some
people
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 may disagree, I strongly agree that the crowd in the future will completely rely on virtual websites, applications, and
E-
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books
Use synonyms
 to read for several reasons. The primary reason I support
this
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 view is that virtual reading
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 affects the cost by reducing it to very low or zero compared to the old system of
phyical
Correct your spelling
physical
books
Use synonyms
.
This
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 is because there will be zero money invested
to produce
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in producing
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books
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books,
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 as everything will be online.
For instance
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, physical
books
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 and newspapers are made
by
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of
show examples
 paper and ink.
Moreover
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, that taken in consideration it will
incure
Use the right word
incur
show examples
 some cost to be produced.
Whereas
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 virtual
books
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 or
E-
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books
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 do not need any of that.
As a result
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, reading content would be
for
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apply
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free
which
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, which
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 attracts
population
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the population
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. Another important factor is that online reading drastically
reduce
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reduces
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 waste content because everything will be virtual.
Although
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 opponents argue that
E-
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books
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 can't be more emotionally attached compared to physical
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books
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books,
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 as
people
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wont
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won't
 have collections of
enormous
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an enormous
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 quantity of
books
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. I believe that it is not important to keep a book in
collection
Correct article usage
a collection
show examples
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; instead
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instead
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instead,
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 we should focus on what
books
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illustrates
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illustrate
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 and
information
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the information
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 they provide.
However
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, you can refer
it
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to it
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 again anytime.
Consequently
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, everything in just one place makes it much better to manage and
organize
Change the spelling
organise
show examples
. In conclusion, I strongly believe
over
Correct word choice
that over
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 time
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people
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, people
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 will get used to online
books
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 and newspapers because of some great benefits
like
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, like
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read
Wrong verb form
reading
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 anything you want for free
which
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, which
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also
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 promote huge step towards
equality
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equality,
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 as poor
people
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 can now afford to read
the
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apply
show examples
books
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 which required money earlier.
Additionally
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, no wastage of
papers
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paper
show examples
 and ink. The long-term benefits outweigh any drawbacks.

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task response
Make your main idea more direct in each body part.
task response
Add one clear example with real life detail.
task response
Explain why free online reading will happen, not only that it is cheap.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the start of each paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a smoother way and avoid repeated points.
coherence and cohesion
Check that each sentence clearly connects to the one before it.
task response
You answered the question and gave a clear opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Most ideas stay on the main topic.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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