In many countries, children do not take care of their health as much as before and tend to become more and more overweight. What are the reasons and solutions to this?

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this

Linking Words

contemporary world, it is often said that young people rarely take care of their health as much as in the past and are prone to become fatty around the world. In

this

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essay, I will explain the reasons

Change preposition

for

show examples

this

Linking Words

trend and propose some effective solutions. One cause of

this

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is that fatty

foods

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

fast-food

Correct your spelling

fast food

or instant noodles

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

are quite popular among

children

Use synonyms

. These days, adults are busier than before, caused by AI, which

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

show examples

the amount of work.

As a result

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, they do not have much

time

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to prepare

for

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apply

show examples

meals for their

children

Use synonyms

and end up depending on these unhealthy

foods

Use synonyms

Moreover

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this

Linking Words

trend is

let

Verb problem

led

show examples

development

Correct article usage

the development

show examples

of social

medias

Check wording

media

show examples

- Instagram, TikTok and

Youtube

Fix capitalization

YouTube

show examples

. A lot of influencers post some attractive videos

that

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in which

show examples

they eat unusual

foods

Use synonyms

, including Japanese and Korean

foods

Use synonyms

, which include too much oil.

Therefore

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, tons of

children

Use synonyms

get

to be

Verb problem

apply

show examples

interested in these meals. One approach

Change preposition

show examples

this

Linking Words

trend is that parents manage their kids'

meal

Check wording

meals

show examples

correctly.

Although

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I mentioned that workers today do not have

time

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, they are able to some way to solve it.

For example

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, cooking and storing meals at once on every weekend for weekdays. Students could have something

hand made

Correct your spelling

handmade

. Another method is that school teachers take care of young people's

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

For example

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, they encourage their students to go outside during break

time

Use synonyms

To sum up

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this

Linking Words

problem

caused

Verb problem

is caused

show examples

by for decreasing

time

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to interact with

children

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and

development

Correct article usage

the development

show examples

of the internet,

this

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is possibly

improved

Verb problem

be improved

show examples

by changing

worker's life styles

Check wording

workers' lifestyles

show examples

and school systems.

yukik170114

Apr 24, 2026

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task response

Answer both parts more fully. You gave reasons and solutions, but some ideas are short.

task response

Make your main ideas clearer. Use easy and direct words.

task response

Add more clear examples to support each main point.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas more smoothly. Some sentences are hard to follow.

coherence and cohesion

Use one clear topic sentence at the start of each body paragraph.

coherence and cohesion

Check paragraph order and sentence connection, so your essay moves in a more natural way.

task response

You answered the question with both reasons and solutions.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task response

You used some examples such as fast food, social media, and school break time.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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In many countries, children do not take care of their health as much as before and tend to become more and more overweight. What are the reasons and solutions to this?

Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?

In some countries, people believe that international tourism is a bad thing for their country. What are the reasons for this? How to change their views？

Some people think that new houses should be built in the same style as older houses in the local area. Others disagree and say that local authorities should allow people to build homes in the styles of their own choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Modern children are suffering from the diseases that were once considered to only be meant for adults. Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children. What are its causes, and what solutions can be offered?

Some people believe that the best way to control accidents on city streets is to lower the speed limit but others think there are more important issues that need attention before roads can be safe.