IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people think that technology is now an invaluable study tool for young people. Others, however, believe that it is harmful for the studying process. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some people argue that technological innovations are beneficial for
an
Correct article usage
the
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education
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 of youth,
while
Linking Words
 others believe that
it
Fix the agreement mistake
they
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 can be detrimental
for
Change preposition
to
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 the schooling
process
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. In
this
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essay
Add a comma
essay,
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 I will discuss each perspective and state my own opinion. Using
technology
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 can be harmful for educational
process
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, because some people are being unfair during their studies.
However
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, it can be useful
,
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apply
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 because
learners
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 can access
education
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 despite the circumstances. I firmly believe
,
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apply
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 that
implementation
Correct article usage
the implementation
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 of
technology
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 into a studying
process
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 is great and sometimes even essential for
further
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 improvement. Sometimes
during
Punctuation problem
, during
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 exams or other stages of studying
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learners
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, learners
show examples
 tend to cheat and use some tools that are forbidden for that kind of work.
For example
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, a lot of
students
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 now use
Chat gpt
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ChatGPT
 to make their projects or to pass exams.
This
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 can lead to a worse quality of
education
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 and inequity in the grading system.
On the contrary
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, using
technology
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 can provide
students
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 with numerous opportunities.
Learners
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 can get
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education
Correct article usage
an education
show examples
 even if they are not able to attend their classes physically.
For instance
Linking Words
, during COVID–19
students
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 around the world were forced to stay at home.
The
Correct pronoun usage
They
show examples
 would have never been able to study if not for the
technology
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. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 sometimes technological innovations can harm
educational
Correct article usage
the educational
show examples
process
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due to
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students
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decepting
Correct your spelling
deceiving
, it can benefit schooling even more by allowing
learners
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 to continue their studies despite the circumstances and conditions.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. Your view is clear, but the bad side is too short.
task response
Add one more clear idea for why technology can hurt study. This will make your answer feel more complete.
task response
Use examples with a bit more detail. Your COVID example is good, but the cheating example needs more support.
coherence and cohesion
Put each main idea in its own full paragraph with enough explanation.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words carefully, like 'on the one hand', 'on the other hand', and 'therefore', to guide the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Check small word choices and grammar, because some unclear lines make your ideas harder to follow.
task response
You answered both views and gave your own opinion.
task response
Your position is clear from the start and stays the same.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a simple and easy-to-follow order.
task response
You used examples, especially the one about COVID, to support your point.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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