some peoeple think that exercise is the key to health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
In recent years,
although
Linking Words
some people believe that exercising periodically is very important for our health, others argue that eating nutritious foods, including enough protein, vitamins
or
Punctuation problem
, or
show examples
something
else
Punctuation problem
else,
show examples
is more significant.
Overall
Linking Words
, I mostly agree with the former because exercises
such
Linking Words
as playing soccer or running can reduce our stress easily. On the one hand,
while
Linking Words
a balanced diet is one of the easiest ways for keeping our weight or looks and
people
Change preposition
for people
show examples
who are not good at working out ,it means that we need to limit meals, leading to stress.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is much better to take some
actions physically
Correct word order
physical actions
show examples
in terms of long eyes.
This
Linking Words
is why we can potentially reinforce not only
muscle
Check wording
muscles
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
bones.
For example
Linking Words
, if we have a great body for protecting ourselves from diseases, we can extend our
lifespans
Correct your spelling
life spans
.
In addition
Linking Words
, we can refresh and control our feelings when we are under pressure.
Thus
Linking Words
, the opportunities of being under the weather will drop, and we can have a more sustainable daily life. In conclusion,
whereas
Linking Words
planning a diet is very comfortable and easy for stabilising present health conditions, it is not enough for getting an ideal, and it is the most important key to
do
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
exercise because it brings positive effects to in-body.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer both sides more fully. Say more about why diet is important, not only why exercise is good.
task response
Give a clearer opinion and keep it the same from start to end.
task response
Use one clear main idea in each body part, then explain it with a simple reason or example.
coherence and cohesion
Make your ideas easier to follow. Some lines are hard to understand because the words do not fit well together.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a simple way. Use words like first, also, for example, and in conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Check each sentence so it connects clearly to the one before it.
task response
You answered the full question and gave your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
You used a clear essay shape with introduction, two body parts, and conclusion.
task response
You tried to add an example and reasons to support your view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: