IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Advertisements are the most important marketing strategy to enhance the sale of products? do you agree or disagree?

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In
modarn
Correct your spelling
modern
 life, the best way to
sale
Replace the word
sell
products
Use synonyms
 is
Use synonyms
advertisements
Change preposition
through advertisements
show examples
. I firmly agree with
this
Linking Words
 opinion for several important reasons. The main reason of importance of
advertisements
Use synonyms
 is the opportunities for a wide view.
In other words
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 can
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 out about new
product
Check wording
products
show examples
 only from
advertisements
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it leads to
sale
Correct article usage
the sale
show examples
 of companies'
products
Use synonyms
 effectively.
In addition
Linking Words
,
advertisements
Use synonyms
 often attract
attention
Correct article usage
the attention
show examples
many
Change preposition
of many
show examples
 individuals
Linking Words
also
Correct pronoun usage
, who also
show examples
 get more information about
products
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, with
advertisements
Use synonyms
 company make a good marketing strategy to involve the
costumers
Use the right word
customers
show examples
. Another reason is that
adverisements
Correct your spelling
advertisements
 usually give a possitive emotions.
This
Linking Words
 is because
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 try
make
Verb problem
to make
show examples
advertisements
Use synonyms
 more
colorful
Change the spelling
colourful
show examples
 and useful.
Furthemore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, it shows how their product can solve
people
Use synonyms
's
problem
Check wording
problems
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 suffer
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
 skin
problem
Check wording
problems
show examples
 and
advertisement
Check wording
advertisements
show examples
 demonstrate some new
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 for skin care and promise that
it
Fix the agreement mistake
they
show examples
 help them.
As a result
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 will buy it and want the same results. It is another really working strategy In conclusion,
advertisements
Use synonyms
 play a
crual
Correct your spelling
crucial
 role in marketing strategy to enhance the sale of
products
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 often consider
advertisements
Use synonyms
 as
attractive
Correct article usage
an attractive
show examples
 and useful way to
demostrate
Correct your spelling
demonstrate
 some new
products
Use synonyms

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task response
Answer the question more directly in each body part. Keep saying why ads are the most important way to sell.
task response
Add one more clear and real example to make your ideas stronger.
task response
Explain your ideas more fully. Some points are good, but they are too short.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a simple and smooth way. Some sentences are hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Check paragraph unity. Each paragraph should have one main idea and then support it.
task response
You give a clear opinion from the start and keep it to the end.
task response
You include an example about skin care, and it helps your point.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words like 'In addition', 'For example', and 'As a result'.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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