More and more people are suffering from health problems caused by a modern life style which cannot be treated with modern medicines. Some people think that a return to traditional medicine should be encouraged. To what extent do you agree?

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In recent years, the issue of health problems from modern life has sparked considerable debate.
While
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some people believe that we should use traditional
medicine
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to fix these problems, I strongly agree with
this
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view because natural
medicine
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has no side effects
and
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, and
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it helps us live a healthier life. ​ ​
To begin
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with, one of the primary reasons why I support
this
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position is that traditional
medicine
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is very safe.
This
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is mainly because it uses natural herbs
instead
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of chemicals, which leads to less harm to our
body
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bodies
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.
For example
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, many people use honey and ginger to cure a cold
instead
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of taking tablets.
As a result
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, we can stay healthy without using strong drugs, making
this
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argument highly convincing. ​ ​Another key reason is that traditional
medicine
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helps to change our bad habits.
In other words
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, it teaches us to eat well and exercise daily.
This
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can result in long-term health benefits, which is beneficial in many ways.
For instance
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, natural diets help to reduce stress and body weight easily, thereby strengthening the argument that traditional ways are better for modern lifestyle diseases. ​ ​In conclusion,
although
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there are arguments on both sides, I firmly believe that traditional
medicine
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should be encouraged
due to
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the reasons discussed above.
This
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approach is more beneficial for individuals and society as a
w
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whole

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task response
Answer all parts more fully. You say you agree, but you do not clearly show how far you agree or why modern medicine may still have a place.
task response
Give more exact support for each main idea. Your examples are simple and a bit general, so the essay feels less strong.
task response
Be careful with claims that are too strong, like saying natural medicine has no side effects. This is not always true and can weaken your answer.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, middle, and end, which is good. To get a higher score, make the links between ideas more natural and less repeated.
coherence and cohesion
Some ideas are repeated in a broad way, such as healthy life, bad habits, and benefits. Try to make each body paragraph focus on one clear point only.
coherence and cohesion
The last sentence is cut, so the ending feels unfinished. Make sure the conclusion is complete and clear.
task response
You clearly state your opinion in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
You use two main body paragraphs, so your ideas are easy to follow.
task response
You give examples like honey and ginger, which helps support your point.
coherence and cohesion
You have both an introduction and a conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic approach
  • herbal remedies
  • acupuncture
  • integrative healthcare
  • modern lifestyle diseases
  • prevention
  • patient outcomes
  • sustainable health solutions
  • underlying causes
  • scientifically validated
  • healthcare systems
  • complementary therapies
  • balance and well-being
  • stress management
  • dietary habits
  • acceptance
  • resonate with
  • comprehensive care options
  • formal healthcare systems
  • personal beliefs
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