IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Q. Some people think that newspapers are the best media to learn and get information from while others believe that the internet is a better source. Discuss both perspectives and give your own opinion.

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It is often believed that
people
Use synonyms
 think
newspapers
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 are the best media to learn and get
information
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by
Punctuation problem
, by
show examples
 lowering the spread of misinformation.
However
Linking Words
, others argue that the
technology
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 is better since it is more convenient and more accessible. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 view because the internet creates an easy
way
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 to learn by expanding knowledge. On the one hand,
people
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 consider
newspapers
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 to be the best
way
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 of getting
information
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 from reliable sources by reducing the spread of misinformation.
In other words
Linking Words
, individuals were aware that
newspapers
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 act as
real world
Correct your spelling
real-world
 tools which undergo monitoring reviews before they
become
Verb problem
are
show examples
 published.
In addition
Linking Words
,
newspapers
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 are sources for developing critical thinking skills and providing general knowledge about both the local and global world.
For example
Linking Words
, prior to the development of new
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technology
Add a comma
technology,
show examples
 the majority of teachers were relying on
newspapers
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 to take data or experiment and explain them
for
Change preposition
to
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 the students.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that
this
Linking Words
 is not an effective
way
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for improving
Wrong verb form
to improve
show examples
 learning and
getting
Wrong verb form
get
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 up-to-date
information
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is thought that
people
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 who see the internet as the best source since it changes the
way
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 you get
information
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 to be quicker and enables learning to be more convenient. It is possible to say that the new
technology
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 allows access
to be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
at any time, so
this
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 increases flexibility
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 getting
information
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.
For instance
Linking Words
, during
pandemic
Correct article usage
the pandemic
show examples
 COVID-19
online
Punctuation problem
, online
show examples
 learning helped by changing the normal
way
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for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 learning into a different
way
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which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 helped many of the students to succeed. It would seem that
technology
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 improves the process of getting any kind of
information
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 within just a few seconds, and
making
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
 the learning process easier. In conclusion, there is no straightforward answer to
this
Linking Words
 issue.
Although
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 agree
Use synonyms
newspapers
Correct word choice
that newspapers
show examples
 are the best media to learn and get
information
Use synonyms
. I am inclined to believe that the internet improves how we
are getting
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
information
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 and
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 more flexibility and availability.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. You talk about newspapers and the internet, but some ideas are not fully developed.
task response
Make your opinion very clear from start to end. Your view is clear, but it should stay more direct in each body paragraph.
task response
Use more specific examples. Your example about COVID-19 helps, but the newspaper example is not very clear.
coherence and cohesion
Some ideas are hard to follow because of long or unclear sentences. Try shorter and clearer sentences.
coherence and cohesion
Linking is good in parts, with phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand', but some links feel forced.
coherence and cohesion
Support each main point with a clear reason and one clear example. Do not add too many ideas in one sentence.
task response
You answer the full question and discuss both views.
task response
Your opinion is clear: you prefer the internet.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear basic structure: introduction, two body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use clear paragraphing and easy linking words.
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