IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign langulage can cause serious problems, as well as practical problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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In modern times, it is undeniable that most individuals are migrating to various countries for better opportunities and study purposes. There are those who say that living in a country where
people
Use synonyms
 have to
be known
Verb problem
learn
show examples
 a foreign
language
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 without
this
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people
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 may
face
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 several
difficulities
Correct your spelling
difficulties
as well as
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 practical problems.
However
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, I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 perspective, because it
play
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plays
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 a vital role in different
sector
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sectors
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,
such
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 as
communicate
Replace the word
communication
, society lifestyles,
traditions
Correct word choice
and traditions
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 need to be
understand
Wrong verb form
understood
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. One of the main reasons is that
a
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apply
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communication helps to gather
informations
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information
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 and build a relationship with native
people
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.
For instance
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, a person who
making
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makes
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 a good relationship with local individuals, and they may help to get occupations opportunty.
In addition
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, those who
living in
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live
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 overseas
, they
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apply
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 have to get knowledge about their heritage.
This
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 helps to get a lot of
offer
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offers
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 from various events.
For example
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, in the western
regional
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region,
people
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 would like to
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
organise events.
On the other hand
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, staying abroad without no that country
language
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Punctuation problem
,
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also
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 citizens may
face
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 practical problems, namely searching for
motel
Correct article usage
a motel
show examples
, specific stores and locations. To clarify, without knowing
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language
Correct article usage
the language
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 may
face
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 hassle
to reach
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in reaching
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 the destination.
For example
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, a person who living London, and he
came
Wrong verb form
comes
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 to Bangladesh, he does not know
their
Correct determiner usage
the
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language
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, but he has to go certain
loaction
Correct your spelling
location
,
perphaps
Correct your spelling
perhaps
this
Linking Words
 person
face
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 difficulities to reach that place.
Furthermore
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,
in the
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apply
show examples
overseas, sometimes
people
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 did not understand professional
language
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word
Check wording
words
show examples
.
As a result
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,
small
Correct article usage
a small
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 portion of individuals could not understand the food name, and many
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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 purchase
wrong
Correct article usage
the wrong
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 one.
To conclude
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, citizens who
staying
Verb problem
are staying
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in
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apply
show examples
overseas may
face
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 problems because of
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language
Correct article usage
a language
show examples
 barrier,
such
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 as communication, diverse heritage and living styles.
Linking Words
Therefore
Punctuation problem
Therefore,
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 I
strong
Rephrase
strongly
show examples
 agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, and the public should learn
Use synonyms
language
Correct article usage
a language
show examples
 before moving abroad.

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task response
Answer the question more directly in each part. Say clearly why you agree, and keep this same idea from start to end.
task response
Use more clear main ideas. Some ideas are good, but they are not fully explained.
task response
Give examples that are more real and exact. Some examples are hard to understand.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each body paragraph. This will make your essay easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a simple and correct way, like 'first', 'also', 'for example', 'therefore'.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order and grammar, because some parts break the flow of the essay.
task response
You answered the topic and gave a clear opinion: you agree with the statement.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You tried to use examples to support your ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • communication barriers
  • social isolation
  • language proficiency
  • career advancement
  • access to services
  • cultural misunderstandings
  • miscommunication
  • assimilation
  • essential services
  • frustration
  • isolation
  • employment challenges
  • healthcare
  • legal assistance
  • cultural norms
  • social friction
  • language barrier
  • restrict job opportunities
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