IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You enjoyed a holiday organized by a tour company. Write a letter to the manager and praise the tour guide who accompanied you on the journey. In your letter, you should: • describe the details of your holiday • explain what the tour guide did that was helpful • suggest how the manager may reward the tour guide.

#holiday #tour #company #manager #praise #guide #journey #reward
Dear Sir, I am writing
this
 letter to
appreciate
Verb problem
thank
show examples
 the
tour
guide
 who was with me on
tour
. The name of the
tour
guide
 is
Sid
 . Me and my family planned a
tour
 with your company first time . We went to India and stayed for 2 weeks over there. We discovered new
places
 , cultures , and food from different regions . My journey started on 1st April. The hotel booked by your company was
an
Change the article
apply
show examples
amazing. The
tour
guide
 helped us a lot in order to enhance the beauty of our
tour
 .
Firstly
 , he made a list of
places
 and shared it with us ,
along with
this
 , he always provided important information about the
places
 , which helped us a lot to get familiar with the environment . The most important thing I would like to mention here is knowledge about the food . Because during the journey eating delicious food not only made my mood happy but
also
 you I enjoyed the
tour
 in a better way . Despite having fewer days , we explored and enjoyed more
places
 with the help of
Sid
 .
Sid
 has a great knowledge about the
places
 and the
tour
 guided by him was unbelievable. I believe that you should increase his salary or give
bonus
Correct article usage
a bonus
show examples
 as a reward . Thank you so much again to you and
tour
guide
Sid
 . Yours faithfully, Baljot Kaur
Submitted by baljotkaur2510 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the development of ideas is organized and logical.
coherence cohesion
Making small improvements in sentence structure and punctuation can enhance clarity and readability.
task achievement
The details given about the holiday and the tour guide's contributions were well-described, effectively satisfying the task requirements. If possible, providing even more specific examples could further strengthen the response.
coherence cohesion
The letter has a clear structure, starting with gratitude, followed by describing the holiday, praising the tour guide, and concluding with a recommendation for the guide's reward.
task achievement
Your politeness and the positive tone throughout the letter is well-suited for a letter of praise, contributing to a good overall impression.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
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