IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows changes in global food and oil prices between 2000 and 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The line graph compares the fluctuations in worldwide
food
Use synonyms
 and
oil
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prices
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 from 2000 to 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
,
during the
Change preposition
for
show examples
 most of the time
period
Use synonyms
,
food
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prices
Use synonyms
 increased
Linking Words
along with the
Correct word order
significantly along with the oil prices
show examples
oil
Use synonyms
prices
Use synonyms
 significantly.
Linking Words
Thereafter
Punctuation problem
Thereafter,
show examples
 both
prices
Use synonyms
 decreased
sharply
Punctuation problem
sharply,
show examples
 followed by a sudden
incrase
Correct your spelling
increase
.
In
Change preposition
At
show examples
 the beginning of the
timeline
Add a comma
timeline,
show examples
 both categories recorded their lowest statistics
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 was
food
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
index
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apriximately
Correct your spelling
approximately
 90 points and average
oil
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prices
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 per barrel at around $25. During the first
5 years
Correct word choice
5-year
show examples
period
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, the gap between the average
oil
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price
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 and the
food
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price
Use synonyms
index
Use synonyms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 relatively similar
while
Linking Words
 exhibiting a gradual increase.
However
Linking Words
, between 2005 and 2007,
oil
Use synonyms
prices
Use synonyms
 soared comparatively to the
food
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
price
Check wording
prices
show examples
. Later that
period
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, both average
oil
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prices
Use synonyms
 and
food
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
index
Use synonyms
 plummeted
with in
Correct your spelling
within
 one and
half
Correct article usage
a half
show examples
 years, reaching nearly $130 and 220 points respectively,
oil
Use synonyms
prices
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 reacing it's peak value during 2008. Most notable data fluctuation happened during the 2008 and 20011
period
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.
Mopreover
Correct your spelling
Moreover,
at the end
Linking Words
 of the
period
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oil
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
 reached nearly $80,
stood at
Verb problem
apply
show examples
its peak value throughout the years,
Linking Words
along with
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 the
food
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
index
Use synonyms
 reached 180 points .

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "along with".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words food, oil, prices, period, price, index with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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