IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

It is important for everyone including young people to save money for their future to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

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In today’s
fast paced
Correct your spelling
fast-paced
 world, it is suggested that children should fund
budget
Correct article usage
a budget
show examples
 for their
future
Use synonyms
 themselves
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
while
Linking Words
,
the
Correct word choice
while the
show examples
 vast majority of people argue that young people
need
Verb problem
do
show examples
 not
Use synonyms
store
Verb problem
need to save
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money
Use synonyms
.I strongly agree that individuals must save their sums to prevent different difficulties in the
long-tern
Correct your spelling
long term
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will examine why the folks needed to stockpile budget. On the one hand, it is widely accepted that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
the public
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
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 to
store
Use synonyms
 their
money
Use synonyms
 not only for long-term difficulties but
also
Linking Words
 by doing
this
Linking Words
 they improve their ability to stockpile
budget
Correct article usage
a budget
show examples
 generally.
Furhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
,some jobs require the ability to
store
Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
that
Correct word choice
so that
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 individuals
could
Wrong verb form
can
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 foster their
skill
Check wording
skills
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 from a young age.As an example of
this
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,
according to
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 the data, businessman have to know
saving
Wrong verb form
how to save
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money
Use synonyms
due to
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 the fact that, when they investigate their
Use synonyms
money
Check wording
finances
show examples
 for starting
Correct article usage
a business
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business
Punctuation problem
business,
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 they
required
Verb problem
are required
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 to invest a great deal of
money
Use synonyms
 at once
that
Correct pronoun usage
, which
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 would be challenging and even cause
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
chronic anxiety to find that amount of
sums
Check wording
money
show examples
.
One
Use the right word
On
show examples
 the other hand, it is believed that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
while
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 young citizens
concern
Wrong verb form
are concerned
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 about their
future
Use synonyms
life
Punctuation problem
life,
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 they may forget about
current
Correct determiner usage
their current
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 ones and these worries could lead to chronic diseases that would
last
Linking Words
 long.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,only thinking about funding
money
Use synonyms
 will influence
to
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 quality of life
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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this
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 can lead to
forget
Wrong verb form
forgetting
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 about current opportunities,
such
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 as education.
To sum up
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, it is a recent predicament that the young population need to
store
Use synonyms
 fundings for their
future
Use synonyms
 careers.From my point of view, saving
money
Use synonyms
 for
Use synonyms
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 would ease job opportunities in the long run.

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task response
Answer the question more directly in each body part. Say why you agree, and keep this clear from start to end.
task response
Use main ideas that are easy to understand. Some ideas are too general or not fully explained.
task response
Add one clear and real example for each main point. This will make your essay stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Make topic sentences clear. Each paragraph should have one main idea only.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a simple and correct way. Some linking words are used, but a few are not natural or make the meaning hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Check paragraph flow. A few sentences do not connect well to the point before them.
task response
You give a clear opinion: you strongly agree.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You try to discuss both sides before giving your final view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • safety net
  • unforeseen circumstances
  • emergencies
  • future investments
  • retirement planning
  • financial discipline
  • habit of saving
  • amassing wealth
  • substantial fund
  • opportunity cost
  • additional income
  • inflation
  • purchasing power
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