Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #person #opportunity

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Wealth

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undoubtedly provides numerous opportunities, one of which is the ability to help

others

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While

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some people believe that the primary benefit of being rich is the opportunity to assist

others

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, I partially agree with

this

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view.

While

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helping

others

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is a significant advantage, there are other important aspects of

wealth

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that should not be overlooked.

Firstly

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, having substantial

wealth

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does indeed provide individuals with the means to contribute to society in meaningful ways. Wealthy people can donate to charities, fund educational institutions, and support healthcare initiatives, all of which can have a lasting impact on the lives of

others

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For example

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, philanthropists like Bill Gates and Warren Buffett have used their fortunes to address global issues

such

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as poverty, disease, and education, demonstrating that

wealth

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can be a powerful tool for positive change.

Additionally

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, by helping

others

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, wealthy individuals can find a sense of purpose and

fulfillment

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fulfilment

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that goes beyond material possessions.

However

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, focusing solely on the altruistic potential of

wealth

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overlooks other significant benefits that come with financial security.

Wealth

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also

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provides personal freedom, allowing individuals to pursue their passions, invest in their education, and explore new opportunities without the constraints of financial limitations.

For instance

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, financial independence enables people to take risks,

such

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as starting a new business or investing in innovative projects, which can lead to personal growth and societal advancements.

Moreover

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wealth

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can enhance the quality of life for the individual and their family, providing access to better healthcare, education, and leisure activities. In conclusion,

while

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the ability to help

others

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is undoubtedly one of the most valuable aspects of being wealthy, it is not the only important benefit.

Wealth

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also

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offers personal freedom, opportunities for growth, and a higher quality of life.

Therefore

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while

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I agree that helping

others

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is a significant advantage of being rich, it is essential to recognize the broader spectrum of benefits that

wealth

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can provide.

Submitted by 645119931 on Tue Aug 27 2024

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relevant specific examples

While your examples are solid and well-chosen, adding more specific examples or further elaboration could enhance your points. For instance, you could mention more specific initiatives by philanthropists or different ways wealth can lead to personal growth.

clear comprehensive ideas

Try to occasionally use varied sentence structures and advanced vocabulary to make your essay even more engaging and demonstrate a higher language level.

logical structure

Your essay is well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a concluding summary. This structure helps in maintaining a logical flow throughout.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction and conclusion are both strong, framing the essay well and summarizing the argument effectively.

complete response

You provide a balanced view on the topic, acknowledging multiple aspects of wealth. This comprehensive approach strengthens your argument.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

316 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

wealthy
financial resources
philanthropy
charitable organizations
donations
fundraising
support
initiatives
contribute
fulfillment
purpose
selfless
altruistic
prioritize
personal gain

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Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

Some countries have implemented mandatory community service programs for young people. In these programs, children aged 16 to 18 do charity work, help old people or work with animals. What are some advantages and disadvantages of this for young people?

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or mall to do their shopping. Is this positive kr negative development?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?