Now people spend less and less time at home. What are the causes? What are the effects on individual and society?

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Nowadays

Punctuation problem

Nowadays,

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people

Use synonyms

tend to spend more time at

home

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rather than going outside. It is because some of them have an

Use synonyms

introvert

Replace the word

introverted

personality and

already

Verb problem

are already

show examples

exhausted from

work

Use synonyms

Linking Words

However

Add a comma

However,

show examples

this

Linking Words

will lead them to have an

undevelop

Correct your spelling

underdeveloped

social skill and

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of networking. On one hand,

people

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that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

have an

introvert

Use synonyms

personality tend to have a limited social battery.

This

Linking Words

will lead them to feel tired faster than an

extroverd

Correct your spelling

extroverted

one, because when they choose to go outside and

socialized

Wrong verb form

socialise

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with many

people

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, they need to force their energy to talk with them.

For

Linking Words

example

Add a comma

example,

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if an

introvert

Use synonyms

person

Use synonyms

going

Wrong verb form

goes

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to a party, they prefer to

going

Wrong verb form

show examples

home

Use synonyms

early because they feel overwhelmed

Change preposition

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the crowded situation, and I think that the biggest reason why an

introvert

Use synonyms

person

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choose

Correct subject-verb agreement

chooses

show examples

to be a

Use synonyms

home body

Correct your spelling

homebody

or stay at

home

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On the other hand

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

that already

exchausted becaused

Correct your spelling

exhausted because

of their workload, will choose to sleep at

home

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rather than hang out with their friends.

For

Linking Words

instance

Add a comma

instance,

show examples

if a corporate

person

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already

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

a 9 to 5 job, they will definitely choose to watch their favourite series at

home

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rather than do activities outside with their friends or

colleages

Correct your spelling

colleagues

such

Linking Words

party

Correct article usage

a party

show examples

watch

Correct determiner usage

show examples

concert, or even sports.

Therefore

Linking Words

, they choose to stay at

home

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, these causes will give a side side effects to indivual which is having an undevelop social

skill

Check wording

skills

show examples

. It is because they

already

Verb problem

are already

show examples

used to being alone and not talking to other

people

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, if

this

Linking Words

person

Use synonyms

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

a conference invitation from their

companies

Check wording

company

show examples

and they should come

but

Punctuation problem

, but

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since they do not have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

adequate social skills, it will be very challenging for them to talk with other

person

Use synonyms

in that event. Talking to other

people

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sounds simple, but it is a different case for

people

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who

not

Verb problem

are not

show examples

used to

socialized

Wrong verb form

socialising

show examples

with

ther

Correct your spelling

their

people

Use synonyms

because it is hard for them to

make

Verb problem

have

show examples

a great conversation.

Lastly

Linking Words

, the side effect that they might get from society is

having

Verb problem

apply

show examples

a lack of

network

Correct article usage

a network

show examples

. For

people

Use synonyms

who

work

Use synonyms

corporate

Correct article usage

the corporate

show examples

field, it is very important to have

great

Correct article usage

a great

show examples

network, especially with

people

Use synonyms

in their field.

For

Linking Words

instance

Add a comma

instance,

show examples

if these

people

Use synonyms

choose to stay at

home

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rather than going out to a

work

Use synonyms

gathering with their

colleage

Correct your spelling

colleague

than

Use the right word

then

show examples

how will they build a connection with them

Change the punctuation

show examples

This

Linking Words

connection or network can not be achieved if they choose to spend their time at

home

Use synonyms

To sum up

Linking Words

, many

people

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nowadays prefer to spend their time at

home

Use synonyms

rather than going outside,

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

causes

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their

introvert

Use synonyms

personality and feeling exhausted because of their

work

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

will lead them to have an undevelop social skills and

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of networking.

Hany

May 13, 2026

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task response

Answer all parts more clearly. You talk about causes and effects, but the effect on society is not fully clear.

task response

Make your main ideas more direct. Write one clear cause in each body part and one clear effect in each body part.

task response

Use examples that are more general and more real. Some examples are too long and do not strongly prove the point.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas in a smoother way. Some parts feel repeated, and some sentences are too long.

coherence and cohesion

Check paragraph focus. The third paragraph is about the person, but the fourth should show society more clearly.

coherence and cohesion

Use simple linking words well: First, Second, As a result, For example, In short.

coherence and cohesion

You have a clear introduction and a clear ending.

task response

You give causes and effects, so you try to answer the full question.

task response

You use examples in each main part, which helps support your ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
42
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

447 words

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Now people spend less and less time at home. What are the causes? What are the effects on individual and society?

Exposure to international media such as films, TV and megazines has significant impact on local culture. What do you think has been the impact? Do you think its advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to the cities, so the population in the countryside is decereasing. Do you think that this is a positive or a negative development?