Some people think everyone should be a vegetarian because we do not need to eat meat to have a healthy diet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, some people argue that everyone should adopt a vegetarian
diet
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because eating
meat
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is not necessary for maintaining good health.
However
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,
i
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I
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completely disagree with
this
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view, as
i
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I
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believe that
meat
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remains an important part of a balanced
diet
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and that promoting vegetarianism for
whole
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the whole
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population may
also
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create economic problems. One major reason why
i
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I
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disagree with a fully vegetarian
diet
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is that
meat
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provides important nutrients which can be difficult to obtain from plant-based food alone.
Although
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vegetables and grains contain certain vitamins and proteins,
meat
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is still a key source of iron, vitamin B12 and high-quality protein. If people avoid
meat
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for a long period of time without careful dietary planning, they may suffer from health problems
such
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as weakened immunity, fatigue, or poor physical development.
This
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issue could be especially serious for children and elderly people, who generally require more balanced nutrition to maintain healthy body functions. Another problem is that encouraging everyone to become vegetarian could negatively affect the livestock and farming industries. As the demand
on
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for
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animal-related businesses may
face
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lead to
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financial difficulties or even unemployment. In some rural areas,
animals
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animal
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farming is one of the main sources of income for local residents.
Therefore
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, a sudden shift towards vegetarianism could reduce economic stability for many families and communities. In conclusion,
although
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vegetarian diets may be suitable for some individuals,
i
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I
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do not believe that everyone should avoid eating
meat
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. A balanced
diet
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including moderate
meat
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consumption is beneficial for health, and maintaining the
meat
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industry is
also
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important for economic stability.

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task response
Make your ideas more clear with one strong example in each body part.
task response
Explain more why meat is needed, not only name the nutrients.
coherence and cohesion
Your second body part has one grammar problem, so the idea is a bit hard to follow. Check sentence links more carefully.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a more natural way and do not overuse them.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each main point a little more before moving to the next one.
task response
You answer the question clearly and your opinion is easy to see from the start.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each body part has one main idea, which helps the reader follow your essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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