The maps below show the changes that took place in a coastal town called Pentland between 1950 and 2007.

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The provided maps delineate the shift of a coastal city named Pentland, across a
57 years
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57-year
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timeframe.
Overall
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, significant changes can be observed from 1950 to 2007, and in the latter year, the
coastalside
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coast
became organised and well developed.
Firstly
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, the western part of the town in the 1950 map depicted an industrial area,
whereas
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in 2007,
this
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was removed from the city and replaced with multi-storied car parking,
aditionally
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additionally
a
swiming
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swimming
pool and a park were added. In stark contrast, the seaside was converted into a dock, where the affluent can park their yacht or private ships.
However
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, the southwest and northeast parts of the city were unoccupied during 1950, but in 2007, in the southwest area, a cinema or theatre zone was created , and the northeast part was used for apartments and shops.
Conversely
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, the grassland area of the southeast was replaced by houses. In conclusion, the Pentland underwent significant changes during the 57 years and
becacme
Correct your spelling
became
a well-organised tourist-attracting coastal town.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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