Some parents give their children everything that their children ask for or allow them to do whatever they want to do. Is this good for children? What could be the consequences for these children when they grow up?

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These days
some
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, some
show examples
parents give their kids whatever they want or they want to do. I`m against
this
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type of upbringing as it
is proved
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has been proven
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that children
could
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can
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become capricious. In
this
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essay
Add a comma
essay,
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we will argue about the situation and consider
both-negative
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both negative
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and positive sides of it. Some
of
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apply
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families want to
rise
Verb problem
raise
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their kids with confidence and feel of freedom. In the long run, they chose to
fulfill
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fulfil
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their every
wishes
Fix the agreement mistake
wish
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just to see them happy. After giving permission to do everything they want, minors become uncontrollable,
thus
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it would become a problem for their family and teachers.
Furthermore
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,
this
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can make a barrier for communication
children
Change preposition
between children
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with
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and
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their peers. Because a youth who never hears "no" struggles to delay gratification. It is
showed
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shown
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by psychologists
,
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that
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this
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type of
educating
Replace the word
education
can injure
child`s
Correct article usage
a child`s
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ego.
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Hence
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Hence,
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there is a lack of boundaries with ego-centric people. Adults
that
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who
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rose with
this
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kind of parenting style can suffer from
lack
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a lack
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of resilience and responsibility.
For instance
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, it can be
reason
Correct article usage
a reason
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for conflicts at work or at education and financial irresponsibility, relationship difficulties. These individuals often struggle with finding a long-term partner. In conclusion, we don`t have to spoil our sons and daughters to see them happy
of
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with
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life.
Instead
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of
it
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it,
show examples
we have to prepare them for
adult`s
Check wording
adult
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life challenges. Mature individuals should teach minors that short-term benefits are not essential for happiness and peace of mind.
In addition
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, majors should teach adolescents to earn someone`s attention or
love
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love,
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they need to act
kind
Rephrase
kindly and respectfully
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,
respectful
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and
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,
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apply
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to communicate
honestly
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honestly,
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especially with elders. They have to learn from
own
Correct determiner usage
their own
show examples
mistakes.

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task response
Answer both parts more directly: say clearly why this is bad, then say what may happen in adult life.
task response
Use one clear main idea in each body paragraph, and explain it with one simple example.
task response
Do not say you will discuss both good and bad sides, because the task asks if it is good and what the results are.
coherence and cohesion
Make links between ideas easier to follow. Use simple words like First, Also, As a result, For example, In conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Keep sentence order clear: topic sentence, explanation, example, result.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid unclear phrases and broken grammar, because they make the meaning hard to follow.
task response
You give a clear opinion in the first paragraph: you are against this style of parenting.
task response
You answer both parts of the question: effect on children now and results when they grow up.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words like Furthermore, For instance, and In conclusion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • indulgence
  • overindulgence
  • leniency
  • emotional resilience
  • rejection
  • entitlement
  • realistic expectations
  • self-regulated behavior
  • egocentric
  • financial management
  • professional relationships
  • collaboratively
  • criticism
  • appreciation
  • value
  • effort
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