IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

many students today graduate high school and then want to continue their studies overseas. Give the advantages and disadvantages of studying in another country.

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Introduction
The world has changed a great deal from the past. There are many steudents prefer to continue their studies in other countries after graduating from high school.
Also
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, there are many
advantages
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 and
disadvantages
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 that
students
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 will
face
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.
This
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 essay will explain the
advantages
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 and
disadvantages
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 to continue studies overseas.
Body · 1
On the one hand, there are many
advantages
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 to
continue
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continuing
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 studies overseas.
First,
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many
students
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 want better education after
graduate
Wrong verb form
graduating
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 from high school.
However
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, they want to study at Universities have a high academic reputation.
Also
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, they want to improve their learning and education with better ways with
this
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 Universities.
Second,
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there are many chances to improve their English
language
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 and learn new cultures.
In addition
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,
students
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 can improve their
language
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 via communication with other
students
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 from different countries.
Moreover
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, they can learn about new cultures from new
students
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 and people.
Finally
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, they can build an excelant networking through
students
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 they came from different countries with different cultures.
As a result
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, networking can help
students
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 with their future. Because of
this
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, the
students
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 will know more about networking , and
this
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 will help them to get a better future.
Body · 2
On the other hand
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, there are many
disadvantages
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 that
students
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face
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 when they want to study overseas.
First,
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the costs are a big problem that the
students
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face
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 overseas.
However
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, they need to balance payments, rent and shopping.
Second,
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they will be lonely and far from family.
Also
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, they will miss their family every day and stay alone.
Finally
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, the
language
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 is a big problem they
face
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 and communication difficulties.
Furthermore
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, they live alone without family and friends that why faced difficult in communication and
language
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 with other people.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is clear to see that there are many
advantages
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 for
students
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 to study overseas.
Also
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 , we see the
disadvantages
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 the
students
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 faced in
this
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 situation.

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task response
For task response, you answer both sides, so this is good. But your ideas are often very general. Add one clear real example for each main point.
task response
For task response, explain your points more. For example, say why a good university helps students in future work.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear intro, body, and end. This is good. But some sentences do not link well. Use simple linking words like first, also, for example, and as a result in a more careful way.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some ideas repeat, like networking and future. Try to say one idea one time, then move to the next idea.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some sentences are hard to follow because of grammar order. Write shorter sentences with one main idea each.
task response
You cover both advantages and disadvantages, so you answer the full question.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has clear paragraphs for each side, and it has an introduction and conclusion.
task response
You use topic words well, like education, language, culture, and cost.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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