The internet is an amazing invention which has changed the world. Give the advantages and disadvantages of the internet.

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Introduction
The
internet
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has truly changed society. It has affected how
people
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live.
However
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, not everything about the
internet
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is positive.
This
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essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of the
internet
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.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand, there are numerous advantages to the
internet
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.
First,
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the
internet
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is incredible for communication.
For example
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, if someone wants to apply for a job outside the country, the interview will be conducted on Zoom , which will be used by the
internet
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.
Also
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, many
people
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use social media applications
such
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as Instagram and TikTok to keep in touch.
Second,
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the
internet
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is amazing for education.
For instance
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, if someone wants to start an MBA online, it will be used on the
internet
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.
Additionally
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, the
internet
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is tremendous for entertainment. Nowadays, many
people
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feel bored, so they can use their time by watching the news
,
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apply
show examples
or funny videos on YouTube.
Moreover
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, playing video games is very popular today.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, there are several disadvantages of the
internet
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. A prime example would be the dangers to children. Nowadays, children stay a long time on the
internet
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and play video games, like PS5 or PC.
This
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can cause many serious health issues.
Second,
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another problem is the hackers online.
For instance
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, many
people
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have been hacked.
For example
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, their social media accounts, bank accounts, or websites might be at risk. Third, it can be an incredible waste of time. Too many
people
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spend countless hours online.
This
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affects their relationships in the real world as they live in the virtual world.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is clear to see that the
internet
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has many advantages.
However
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, it must be noted that it
also
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has some disadvantages.

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Task response
You answer both parts of the task: the good and bad sides of the internet. To make your ideas stronger, explain each main point more fully. For example, say how online study helps people who live far from schools, or how too much game time can harm sleep and health.
Task response
Some examples need to be more exact. Zoom is a clear example of online talks, but the sentence about an MBA is not clear. Write that people can study for an MBA through online classes, even when they cannot go to a school.
Task response
Try to choose fewer points and give more support for each one. This will make the essay feel more full and less like a list of ideas.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear plan: an opening, a paragraph about good sides, a paragraph about bad sides, and an ending. Keep this clear shape.
Coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with more care. You use “First”, “Second”, “Also”, and “For example” well, but some are used too often. You can join ideas more smoothly by showing the reason or result: “As a result”, “Because of this”, or “This means that”.
Coherence and cohesion
Make the link between each example and its main idea clearer. After the example about hacking, add a short line such as: “This can cause people to lose money or private information.”
Coherence and cohesion
Check small spacing and word form issues, such as “internet.Additionally” and “on Zoom”. Clean writing helps the reader follow your ideas more easily.
Task response
You cover important good sides of the internet, such as communication, study, and free-time use. You also include real problems, such as health risks, hacking, and lost time.
Task response
Your examples are related to the topic and easy to understand, especially online job talks, social media, and online account safety.
Coherence and cohesion
Each body paragraph has a clear main focus, so the reader can easily see the good sides first and the bad sides next.
Coherence and cohesion
The opening tells the reader what the essay will discuss, and the ending brings both sides together clearly.
Your opinion

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