Some people think that offenders should be put in prison. Others, however, believe that providing offenders with education and training is more effective than putting them in prison. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Introduction

Undoubtedly, with the rapid development of modern society, reducing

crime

Correct article usage

the crime

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rate has become a critical issue.

Whereas

Linking Words

some people look upon putting

offenders

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into prison as the most effective way, others refer to providing

offenders

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with

education

Use synonyms

and training as a more sustainable solution. As for my perspective, I am in

favor

Change the spelling

favour

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of the latter, and the reasons will be elaborated on thoroughly as follows.

Body · 1

An array of causes may lead to why some people believe that

offenders

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should go to

prisons

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prison

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To begin

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with, prisons isolate dangerous

criminal

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criminals

from the public.

In other words

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, when

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offenders

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an offender's

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freedom was taken away, it can prevent them from harming people during their go to prison.

Furthermore

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, putting them into jail

Verb problem

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a powerful tool to deter. It is widely observed that if potential criminal

witness

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witnesses

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the consequences of losing freedom, they will be afraid of being punished and choose not to

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commit

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crimes again.

Body · 2

On the other hand

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, as far as I am concerned, providing

offenders

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with

education

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and training is a more sustainable strategy that brings greater long-term benefits.

To begin

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with, moral and legal

education

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can rebuild

offenders

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' core values.

That is

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to say, if they learn how to respect the law,

then

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this

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shift will effectively increase their motivation.

Furthermore

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, skills training helps

offenders

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return to

the

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apply

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work.

For example

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, when they learn carpentry or computer programming, they can easily search

employment

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for employment

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after

out

Verb problem

getting out

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of prison.

Therefore

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it is clear that

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this

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job stability will significantly increase employment rates and balance the social structure.

Conclusion

In conclusion, I believe that providing criminals with

education

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and training is a more sustainable strategy that brings long-term benefits.

Thus

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, it is highly recommended that the government should plan the system when

offenders

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out of

Verb problem

are released from

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jail to ensure a better outcome.

sammi1747

May 26, 2026

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task response

Answer both sides more fully. Your view is clear, but the prison side needs more detail.

task response

Add one more clear example for each main idea. This will make your points stronger.

task response

Explain ideas in a more direct way. Some parts are hard to follow because grammar errors change the meaning.

coherence and cohesion

Use clearer topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas with simple words like 'first', 'also', 'for example', and 'as a result'.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure each sentence connects well to the next one. A few lines feel broken or unclear.

task response

You answered both views and gave your own opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

You use paragraphing well, and the order of ideas is easy to see.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Deterrent
Recidivism
Rehabilitation
Vocational training
Retributive justice
Reintegration
Taxpayers
Social isolation
Stigmatization
Criminal identity
Self-esteem
Public opinion
Societal gains
Offenders
Imprisonment
Cost-effective

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