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Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, Many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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Introduction
In various nations, an increasing number of people prefer to live in solitude.
This
Linking Words
 is primarily
due to
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 a desire for independence, and I believe
this
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 tendency has more harm than its benefits.
Body · 1
To begin
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 with, the primary reason why individuals choose to reside by themselves is the pursuit of independence.
This
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 means that when people live solitarily, they are forced to make autonomous decisions regarding their budget, cooking, and daily problem-solving without relying on others.
For example
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, young adults who move out early tend to develop life skills faster and mature
quicker
Rephrase
more quickly
show examples
.
Therefore
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, the desire for personal growth and self-reliance drives
this
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 growing trend.
Body · 2
On the other hand
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, I believe
this
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 trend has significant negative consequences, including mental health issues and increased living costs.
This
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 is because an isolated lifestyle often brings negative emotions,
such
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 as depression, heightened stress levels, and anxiety, eroding
deep
Correct word choice
great
show examples
 social skills. Another drawback is the financial burden on living standards.
In other words
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, when people live solitarily, they have to pay more for rent, meals, and utility bills, potentially forcing them into a substantial amount of debt.
Thus
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, negative feelings and expensive payments make living alone harder.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
while
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 the main cause of living alone is the need for self-improvement, I believe that
this
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 shift brings many drawbacks.

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task response
Make your main view more clear in the first part. Say why it is more negative in a direct way.
task response
Add one more clear example for the bad side, not only the good side.
task response
Explain your ideas a little more deeply. Some points are good but short.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with more care. Some words are good, but too many can sound forced.
coherence and cohesion
Connect the sentence about social skills more clearly to mental health, or make it a new point.
coherence and cohesion
In body paragraph 2, develop each bad effect with one extra sentence so the paragraph feels more balanced.
task response
You answer all parts of the question and give a clear opinion.
task response
Your ideas are mostly easy to follow and stay on topic.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Most paragraphs have a clear main idea.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • personal freedom
  • autonomy
  • self-reliance
  • personal development
  • sense of belonging
  • loneliness
  • isolation
  • mental health
  • financial stress
  • cultural shifts
  • social norms
  • fulfillment
  • community values
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