Many people think that people cannot help everyone so they should be concerned about their community and country . Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
that people can not help everyone , so they must be concerned about their community. In my
oppinoin
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opinion
, it
depend
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depends
show examples
on you , and who is the person you will help ,
in
Linking Words
addition
Punctuation problem
addition,
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are you can
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can you
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help him
or
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, or
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it wil pe prusser
Correct word order
will it be pressure
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on you ?
Body paragraph 1
To start with
fact
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a fact
show examples
, wich it you do not
has
Wrong verb form
have
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the
abelity
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ability
to help all people , and that has a lot of
reson
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reasons
Body paragraph 2
such
Linking Words
as you do not know
every thing
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everything
,
therefore
Linking Words
you can not solve all
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
,
second
Punctuation problem
second,
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you are not
super hero
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a superhero
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, you
has
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have
show examples
power
and
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, and
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when it finsh you
can nod
Rephrase
cannot
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do
any thing
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anything
and
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, and
show examples
I think it will
finsh
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finish
after one problem .
Body paragraph 3
But what about
concerned
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being concerned
show examples
for your community ,
this
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slotion
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solution
has both
pons
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pros
and
cuns
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cons
,
such
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as it will damage your
relaitionsheps
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relationships
, on otherwhise it can help you to
focs
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focus
on
your self
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yourself
and use your energy for
your self
Punctuation problem
yourself. In addition
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,
in addition
Linking Words
it can help you to discover your hopy or it can make you
lonly
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lonely
.
Conclusion
In the
end
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end,
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it
depend
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depends
show examples
on your
carecter
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character
, and what you can do or how much energy you
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
.
alnaim.danah20
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task response
Answer the question more clearly. Say if you agree, disagree, or partly agree, and keep this same idea all through the essay.
task response
Add one or two clear examples to support your ideas. This will make your answer stronger and easier to trust.
task response
Explain your main ideas more. Some points are very short, so the reader cannot fully understand your meaning.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clearer plan: introduction, body 1, body 2, and conclusion. This will help your essay feel more organized.
coherence and cohesion
Link your ideas with simple words like first, also, however, for example, and in conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has one main idea. Now some ideas are mixed together.
task response
You give your opinion in the introduction and again in the end.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has paragraphs, which is a good start for clear writing.
task response
You try to look at both sides of the topic, which shows thinking.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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