IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

some people think that city is the best place to live while other prefer to live in the countryside. discuss both view and give your opinion

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There are two different
believes
Replace the word
beliefs
 among
people
Use synonyms
 about
either
Correct word choice
whether the
show examples
city
Use synonyms
 or
Use synonyms
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
 is the best place to live. In my opinion, both have advantages and disadvantages in terms of location, weather, and occupational opportunity.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, I think that living in the
city
Use synonyms
 provides many more conveniences and approaches to better-paid jobs. The
countryside
Use synonyms
 could be small to medium proximity
of civilization
Change preposition
to civilisation
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 know each other somewhat well. From local businesses, children, to public facility operators, a resident might be able to recall everyone’s names.
However
Linking Words
, because of its smaller number of social members compared to the
city
Use synonyms
, the
countryside
Use synonyms
 has its
monetization
Change the spelling
monetisation
show examples
 circulating only in limited parties inside the community
resulting
Punctuation problem
, resulting
show examples
 in little attractiveness to the investors.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
city
Use synonyms
 has
busier
Correct article usage
a busier
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 environment. There are
much
Correct determiner usage
many
show examples
 more
people
Use synonyms
 than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
countryside
Use synonyms
, but they rarely have interaction with each other outside their business.
However
Linking Words
, in my opinion,
well-beings
Check wording
well-being
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 and conveniences are far more important than
closeness
Correct article usage
the closeness
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
. There are
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
, shopping malls, and many other facilities in a particular area in the
city
Use synonyms
,
approachable
Correct word choice
accessible
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 by
variations of
Correct word choice
various
show examples
 public transportation
available
Check wording
options
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there are always well-paid jobs open for application in the
city
Use synonyms
. There are many
people
Use synonyms
 who dedicate
to
Correct pronoun usage
themselves to
show examples
 working in the
city
Use synonyms
 until they can afford to bring their family to live
Linking Words
together
Rephrase
apply
show examples
with them. In conclusion, it is really up to each person what they prefer,
Use synonyms
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
 or
Use synonyms
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, in the current state of the world
right now
Rephrase
apply
show examples
, it is rather necessary to have stability in life, and a job in the
city
Use synonyms
 provides it.
In addition
Linking Words
, facilities and transportation help
people
Use synonyms
 to achieve their goal easier.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. You talk about the country and the city, but some ideas are still short.
task response
Make your opinion very clear from start to end. Your view is clear, but you can repeat it more directly in the body.
task response
Use more clear and real examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each paragraph and explain it step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Some link words are used well, but a few ideas do not connect smoothly. Check how each sentence leads to the next one.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with long or unclear sentences, because they can make your meaning hard to follow.
task response
You answer both parts of the task and give your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You compare city life and country life in a logical way.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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