The map below shows the changes that have taken place at the waterfront area of a town called Darwin between 2009 and 2014.

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The map illustrates the changes that occurred in Darwin,
waterfront
Correct article usage
the waterfront
show examples
area
Use synonyms
,
only
Rephrase
apply
show examples
over a 5 year period beginning in 2009 and ending in 2014. The noticeable change is the replacement of many green areas with several major infrastructure projects.
To begin
Linking Words
there
Punctuation problem
, there
show examples
were several changes in
industrial
Correct article usage
the industrial
show examples
area
Use synonyms
. A footpath has
build
Wrong verb form
been built
show examples
in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
of the industrial
area
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
to
Linking Words
this
Add a comma
this,
show examples
they
also
Linking Words
planted trees in
this
Linking Words
area
Use synonyms
, three more residential buildings
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
been
build
Wrong verb form
built
show examples
, continuing along the residential
buildings
Punctuation problem
buildings,
show examples
there is a university. There have
also
Linking Words
been changes to the sea in Darwin. A sea can be seen in the south east of the town ahead of the new footpath, and a new harbour has
built
Verb problem
been built
show examples
in
middle
Correct article usage
the middle
show examples
of the sea. The small industrial
area
Use synonyms
has
also
Linking Words
changed
there
Punctuation problem
; there
show examples
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
used to be only a lake and
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
industrial
area
Use synonyms
. Now
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
instead
Linking Words
of
industrial
Correct article usage
an industrial
show examples
Use synonyms
area
Punctuation problem
area,
show examples
they changed it to
swimming
Correct article usage
a swimming
show examples
pool.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Vocabulary: Replace the words area with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 6 times.
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