IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You recently went on a sightseeing tour which you did not enjoy. Write a letter to the manager of the tour company. In your letter: explain why you chose that particular tour explain what you did not like about the tour suggest two ways in which the tour could be improved

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
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 letter to express my dissafaction with the
Sydney
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tour
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 which organized by your company, on 20 May, Friday. I remember the
tour
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 guide whose name is
Kevin
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. The reason why I choose
this
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tour
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 was I want know more about
Sydney
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, and the commercial of it specifically included with these attractions which I want to explore. So I was excited to sign it up without hesitation. During the trip,
Kevin
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 gave us a lot of fun stories and many details about these attractions, he was done the great job.
However
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, what make me dissatified is the tight schedule, whole process was intense, even
Kevin
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 did not have a suffcient break and some people were leaving between locations. I felt exhausted
at the end
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 of the
tour
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, not to mentioned
Kevin
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. I kindly advice you to loose your schedule and organize well about durition of the trip,
otherwise
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, we do not have very pleasant experiense even if
Kevin
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 had tried his best to introduce
Sydney
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. I am look foward to your advanced
tour
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, and I would come visit
Sydney
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 again. Yours sincerely Aiden

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task response
Task response: You answer all parts, but some ideas need more clear detail.
task response
Task response: Say more about why you chose this tour and give two clear fixes with a bit more detail.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your letter has a clear start, middle, and end, but some sentences are hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Link ideas with simple words like because, but, so, and first.
task response
Task response: You clearly say why you took the tour and what you did not like.
task response
Task response: You give two ways to make the tour better.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: The letter uses good letter form with greeting and closing.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Each paragraph has one main idea most of the time.
Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

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