IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents or other adult relatives should make important decisions for their (15 to 18 year-old) teenage children.

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Many people believe that
parents
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 or family relatives
shold
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should
 make
decisions
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 for
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 teenage children.In
this
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 essay ill discuss why
its
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it's
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 important that
parents
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 and adult family members should make important
decisions
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 for their teenagers. Young people are not eligible to make important life
decisions
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 because
their
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they're
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 too young with little to no experience in life.Thats why its their
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parents
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parents'
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 responsibility to make these very important
decisions
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 for their
youngsters
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.
Parents
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 or the relative adults should correct their
teenagers
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teenagers'
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decisions
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 if
their
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they are
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 incorrect and
has
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have
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 many side effects that would ruin or harm their future.
For example
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,when the teenager applies to the wrong major that has no future and
not
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is not
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 available in the job
market
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market,
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 the
parents
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 should take some serious actions to prevent and protect their child from entering the wrong university major. Teenagers from
(
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apply
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 15 to 18 years-old
)
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apply
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 get influenced esaily from social media or their friends.
Youngsters
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 want to try everything they see
on
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in
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 the media
sometimes
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, sometimes
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 even important
decisions
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.So
parents
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 or
relatives
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relatives'
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 actions are needed to help and guide their youngster into the right path.
Youngsters
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 nowadays
dont
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don't
 listen to their
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parents
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parents'
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 advice
especially
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, especially
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 when
its
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it's
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 related to their future
, thats way
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. That's why
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 adult
relative
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relatives
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 should convince the teenager to listen to their
parents
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. In conclusion,
youngsters
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 should not be allowed to
vmake
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make
 important
decisions
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 on their own without any supervision by their
parents
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 or adult
relative
Fix the agreement mistake
relatives
show examples
.

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task response
Answer both sides more clearly, then show why you choose one side.
task response
Add one more clear example to make your idea stronger.
task response
Explain your main ideas more fully with simple reasons.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like because, so, but, and for example.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order so each idea flows in a clear way.
task response
You answered the question and kept the same view all through the essay.
task response
You gave a real example about choosing the wrong major.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Most ideas are grouped well by paragraph.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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