Buying tickets on the internet such as books, air tickets, and groceries is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this outweigh the disadvantages?

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Online shopping is an integral part of our lives in today's fast-paced world.
While
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it has some downsides
such
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as an increase in fraud and an increase in purchasing unnecessary
items
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, I
belive
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believe
the upsides -
time
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saving and a reduction in carbon emissions - can be far greater. One concern about purchasing
items
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online is that it gives criminals the opportunity to steal people's card numbers or sell fake
items
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.
This
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is because some online platforms do not have proper software to eliminate harmful programs that attempt to breach the website's system.
As a result
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, individuals see an excessive amount of
spent money
Correct word order
money spent
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in their bank account. Another drawback is that buying unnecessary
items
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online
incerase
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increases
rapidly nowadays.
Since given
Correct word choice
Given
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that an enormous amount of advertisements for their products, it
draw
Correct subject-verb agreement
draws
show examples
people's attention, which triggers them to buy
unncesary
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unnecessary
items
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such
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as books and groceries.
However
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, online shopping has positive impacts on saving
time
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and considerably reducing carbon emissions.
This
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is because there is no need to travel to a shop by car or public transportation;
instead
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, people can place an order at home, and their package will arrive at their address.
In addition
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, when individuals visit a store, they spend so much
time
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understanding the complicated shelf arrangement, but when they shop online, they can use a search button that enables them to find what they need in a short
time
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. In conclusion,
while
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online shopping has some drawbacks like an increase in fraud and buying
uncessary
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unnecessary
items
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, the positive sides of it outweigh them with
time
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saving and reducing carbon
emissons
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emissions
.

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coherence cohesion
Make your main idea more direct in each body paragraph. Put the topic sentence first, then explain it.
coherence cohesion
Use clearer linking words between ideas, like 'First', 'Also', 'For this reason', and 'As a result'.
task achievement
Give one more clear example for each main point. This will make your answer stronger.
task achievement
Explain your ideas a little more fully, especially why the good points are stronger than the bad points.
task achievement
Check that every sentence clearly answers the question about advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and a clear conclusion.
task achievement
Your essay has a clear position: you think the advantages are stronger.
task achievement
You discuss both disadvantages and advantages, so the response is complete.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Convenience
  • Wide variety
  • Customer reviews
  • Ratings
  • Carbon footprint
  • Environmentally friendly
  • Exclusive discounts
  • Promotional offers
  • Loyalty programs
  • Security risks
  • Identity theft
  • Fraud
  • Delivery issues
  • Physical inspection
  • Stable internet connection
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