In many countries paying for things using mobile phones (cell phone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages ?

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It is common in a lot of countries
using
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to use
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mobile phones
to
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for
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payment. In my opinion,I agree with some
point
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points
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,and I disagree with some
point
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points
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. I agree with the devlopment because,the
developments
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it is good for the people and getting a benefit from it,because, the
developments
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it is being easier today,
for instance
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if you going out and you wanted to buying something and you miss your wallet in you house or any where you can uses your
phone
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to payment,
for example
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, My Brother he lost his
phone
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and the thief had got all the money my brother. I disagree with some point , first of all , the
developments
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make
the
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apply
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people
laziness,
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lazy, also the developments have a negative
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also
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the
developments
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effect
negative to
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on
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the people
,
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apply
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However
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.the affect
developments
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you can use it
positive
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positively
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or
negative
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negatively
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. And
some time
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sometimes
if your
phone
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stallen you will
be lost
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lose
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all your money . In the end
summary
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, summarise
my essay,the
developments
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affects negative and positive
, you
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effects, you
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must
be learning
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learn
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how
can you
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to
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use it
your
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on your
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phone
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and where.

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task response
Give a clear answer in the first part. Say if there are more good points or more bad points.
task response
Add more clear ideas about why phone payment is good and why it is bad.
task response
Use one or two real examples that match your main idea.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each part of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use easy link words like first, also, for example, however, and in the end.
coherence and cohesion
Make your sentences shorter and easier to follow.
task response
You gave both good and bad sides of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
You wrote an opening and an ending.
task response
You tried to use examples to support your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Mobile payments
  • Biometric authentication
  • Transaction costs
  • Budgeting
  • Technological barriers
  • Privacy concerns
  • Data breaches
  • Identity theft
  • Over-reliance
  • Market fragmentation
  • Competing payment apps
  • Financial inclusion
  • Security features
  • User convenience
  • Cashless transactions
  • Digital wallet
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