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Band 4.5

noise pollution is increasing day by day and it is affecting other people’s lives. What are the causes of this problem and what are the solutions that can be taken to solve this problem?

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In
this
Linking Words
 modern era,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
noise
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 has become a topic of considerable debate.
Noises
Use synonyms
 are increasing at an alarming rate. There are numerous
reasons
Use synonyms
 for
this
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 situation,
along with
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 some
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
 to mitigate
this
Linking Words
 problem, which shall be discussed in
this
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 essay.
To begin
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 with, there are compelling
reasons
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 why
noise
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pollution
Use synonyms
 is increasing in
this
Linking Words
 modern society.
Firstly
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,
traffic
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 is a prime reason, as
traffic
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 congestion not only
surges
Verb problem
increases
show examples
 the
Use synonyms
noises
Check wording
noise
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 of unwanted horns, but it
also
Linking Words
 affects the quality of transportation services for the local
people
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. Overpopulation leads to more private and public transportation on the roads.
Consequently
Linking Words
, unwanted horns, car exhausts, and many more things combine to increase the level of
noise
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pollution
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Moreover
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,
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
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 of rules and regulation allow
people
Use synonyms
 to use DJs even at
nights
Check wording
night
show examples
, which mostly
disturb
Correct subject-verb agreement
disturbs
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 common
people
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.
Such
Linking Words
 practise is a second prime
Use synonyms
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
 for an increase in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
noise
Use synonyms
pollution
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. Rise in
noise
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pollution
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 particularly affects the older population.
This
Linking Words
 trend could cause serious ear damage, headache, poor sleep patterns, and even palpitation and anxiety
to the
Change preposition
in
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 heart patients.
Also
Linking Words
, constant
noise
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 could make
people
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 feel irritated, which
Linking Words
further can
Correct word order
can further
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 significantly affect the
overall
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performances
Check wording
performance
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 of the workers.
On the other hand
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, there are numerous methods to solve
this
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 problem.
Firstly
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,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should impose a rule that extreme
noises
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 like
DJ
Check wording
DJs
show examples
 and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 are not permitted after 9 p.m. at night.
This
Linking Words
 would encourage
people
Use synonyms
 to respect each other's privacy.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
traffic
Use synonyms
 police should perform their duties to avoid
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion.
This
Linking Words
 can lead to
easier
Correct article usage
an easier
show examples
 flow of
traffic
Use synonyms
 with no horns and honking.
Nevertheless
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, the schools and the parents should teach their children to avoid making extra
Use synonyms
noises
Check wording
noise
show examples
.
As a result
Linking Words
, a well-mannered society would develop, which can mitigate
this
Linking Words
 problem easily.
To conclude
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,
traffic
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 congestion and lack of rules and
regulation
Check wording
regulations
show examples
 from regimes are two basic
reasons
Use synonyms
 for an increase in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
noise
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should make laws and target the
traffic
Use synonyms
 police on the roads to decrease the level of
noise
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
.

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task response
For task response, answer both parts in a more equal way. You explain causes well, but the solutions part is shorter.
task response
For task response, add one or two clear real-life examples, such as city traffic, loud music at events, or rules in schools.
task response
For task response, make your ideas more exact. For example, explain how one law would work and why it would reduce noise.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear paragraph plan, but some sentences are too long and a bit hard to follow. Split long ideas into shorter sentences.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, use linking words carefully. Some are good, like firstly, moreover, consequently, and to conclude, but do not use too many.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, make the line of ideas smoother. In paragraph 1, move the effects of noise to a separate sentence or connect them more clearly to the main cause.
task response
For task response, you answer both questions: causes and solutions.
task response
For task response, you give clear main causes such as traffic and weak rules.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you use basic linking words well in many places.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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