Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
Many folks believe that adolescent
years
Use synonyms
are actually the most joyful time in people's lives;
however
Linking Words
, others think that
adult
Use synonyms
life
Use synonyms
brings more lasting fulfilment and happiness. In my opinion, strongly state that a mature
life
Use synonyms
is much more satisfactory than a young
adult
Use synonyms
's
life
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, the teen
years
Use synonyms
could be perceived as the most joyful
years
Use synonyms
for a couple of reasons. One of the reasons is that during
this
Linking Words
time, the child gets support from his family, and almost takes no responsibility for doing tasks
such
Linking Words
as chores and paying the bills.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they get involved in many different activities at that age, learn new things, and obtain interesting hobbies. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
, data has shown that children who were engaged in different activities like sports were happier than other inactive teenagers.
Also
Linking Words
, free time is much more during these
years
Use synonyms
as they get to party with friends and go to many places. Despite saying that, I still believe that adulthood is more enjoyable when it comes to freedom.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Adult
Use synonyms
life
Use synonyms
is highly debated to bring
such
Linking Words
fulfilment to
life
Use synonyms
in many aspects.
Although
Linking Words
many responsibilities and duties are expected, there are still many joys that lie behind them.
Firstly
Linking Words
, adults tend to get more free space by moving to a new apartment, which creates peace of mind.
For instance
Linking Words
, it has been shown that
adult
Use synonyms
workers who lived in a single en-suite apartment were more creative and generally happier in the workspace.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the paychecks allow people in their twenties and above to get a more stable
life
Use synonyms
, and an option to travel to many places around the world.
Also
Linking Words
, many think that marriage and having children can lead to
such
Linking Words
fulfilment and a high rate of satisfaction in the long term. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
childhood age is remarkable in every sense in terms of happiness, I strongly argue
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
that older people have a lasting enjoyment despite the responsibility.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer both sides in a more equal way. Your second side is stronger than the first side.
task response
Make your opinion more clear in the introduction. The line 'In my opinion, strongly state' is not natural.
task response
Add more direct support for each main idea. Some ideas are good, but they need a little more explanation.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a more careful way. Some parts connect well, but a few sentences feel sudden.
coherence and cohesion
Keep the same words for age groups. You move between 'teen years', 'childhood', and 'young adult', which can confuse the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Check paragraph flow. A few sentences do not fully follow from the one before.
task response
You answered both views and gave your own opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You used examples to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
The main topic stays clear through the essay.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: