IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Should government invest more money in public transport instead of building more roads?

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Is it worth investing
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 public
transport
Use synonyms
? Over the years, a very important aspect of
society
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,
such
Linking Words
 as mobility across the city, has undergone significant transformations, sparking debates about whether these changes have been beneficial or detrimental. Should the government invest more money in public
transport
Use synonyms
 or
building
Wrong verb form
build
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 more
roads
Use synonyms
?
While
Linking Words
 it is true that public
transport
Use synonyms
 has reduced
their
Fix the agreement mistake
its
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 schedules, creating difficulties for many to arrive at their destinations, it is
also
Linking Words
 important to consider that
roads
Use synonyms
gets
Correct subject-verb agreement
get
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 collapsed, being another reason why investing in public works is highly important. From my perspective,
recognizing
Change the spelling
recognising
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 these factors is essential to ensure
society
Use synonyms
 an
eficent
Correct your spelling
efficient
 service.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of people arrive at their duties by public
transport
Use synonyms
, connecting them to Jobs, education and opportunities.
Nowadays
Punctuation problem
Nowadays,
show examples
buses’
Check wording
bus
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 schedules have been reduced considerably
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
as a result
Linking Words
, it is highly difficult to arrive at a destination on time. On account of
this
Linking Words
, one of the main advantages of investing resources in public transportation is that it can stimulate economic growth.
Secondly
Linking Words
, public
transport
Use synonyms
 plays a crucial role in reducing greenhouse gas emissions. Buses, trains and subway allows extra people to move across the city on the same means, thereby mitigating climate change.
In addition
Linking Words
, investing in cleaner transit options –
such
Linking Words
 as electric buses- helps reduce air pollution
as well as
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air
Verb problem
improve air
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 quality.
In contrast
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,
although
Linking Words
 many argue that public
transport
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 is highly important, private vehicles are essential. In rural areas,
efficent
Correct your spelling
efficient
roads
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 are crucial for conveying products and goods,
for example
Linking Words
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, making extra
roads
Use synonyms
 can benefit not only rural jobs but
also
Linking Words
 tourism,
as well as
Linking Words
traffic
Verb problem
reducing traffic
show examples
 congestion and accidents.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 it is true that private
transport
Use synonyms
 and more
roads
Use synonyms
 are important for a reduced part of
society
Use synonyms
, it is
also
Linking Words
 important to consider what is essential for
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
, being that public transportation. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 investing in
roads
Use synonyms
 can benefit a partial part of the population in their duties, spending money on public
transport
Use synonyms
 is highly essential
due to
Linking Words
 the economic and
ambiental
Use the right word
environmental
show examples
 advantages. I personally believe that investing in
this
Linking Words
 is the best way to achieve a superior
society
Use synonyms
 and
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
.

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task response
Make your main answer more clear in the first paragraph. Say early that the government should spend more on public transport than on roads.
task response
Add one or two more clear examples. For example, say how better bus service helps workers and students each day.
task response
Some ideas are good but not fully explained. Try to show why each point is true with a short reason or result.
coherence cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph. This helps the reader follow your main idea.
coherence cohesion
Link ideas more smoothly. Sometimes the sentences feel a bit disconnected or repeated.
coherence cohesion
Check sentence order and grammar because some lines are hard to follow, and this affects overall flow.
task response
You answer the main question and give your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You include more than one reason for public transport, such as jobs and the environment.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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