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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the charts below show the level o ìf partecipation in education and science in developing and industrialised countries in 1980 and 1990. write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

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The charts below illustrates about participation of people from developed and industrial
countries
Use synonyms
 in
Correct article usage
the
show examples
field of education and science between the
Use synonyms
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 1980
to
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 1990.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that
participents
Correct your spelling
participants
 from industrialised
countries
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 greater than developing
countries
Use synonyms
. The average
year
Use synonyms
 of schooling is dominated by
industrialised
Correct word order
the inhabitants of industrialised countries
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
 inhabitants in both
the
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
year
Use synonyms
.
Similarly
Linking Words
, scientists and technicians per 1000 people are more in industrialised
countries
Use synonyms
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to developing
countries
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 to that
more
Punctuation problem
, more
show examples
 dollars
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 spent on research and development by industrialised
countries
Use synonyms
 in the
Use synonyms
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 1980 and 1990. Keeping in view the
Use synonyms
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 of schooling between these
countries
Use synonyms
 .It is recorded that in
1990
Punctuation problem
1990,
show examples
 industrialised
countries
Use synonyms
 showed a remarkable increase
reaching
Punctuation problem
, reaching
show examples
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 a value of 65%
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is larger than 40
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
recorded in 1980.
However
Linking Words
, developed
countries
Use synonyms
depicts
Correct subject-verb agreement
depict
show examples
 a minor fluctuation. Considering
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 scientist and technicians per 1000 people
developed
Change preposition
in developed
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
 showed a lesser number as compared to industrialised
countries
Use synonyms
.Its value is less than 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
years. Almost 350 US dollar is spent by industrialised
countries
Use synonyms
 on research and development in the
year
Use synonyms
 1990.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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