A portion of the human population believes that criminal behaviour has its roots in genes. Others think that circumstances lead people to commit crimes. Discuss your take on both views and put forward your opinions.

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Whether criminal
behaviour
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is inherited through genes or influenced by a
person
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's surroundings has been a subject of debate.
While
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some
people
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believe that
genetics
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play an important role in shaping human
behaviour
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, others argue that social and environmental circumstances are the main causes of
crime
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. I believe that
although
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genes may influence certain personality traits, criminal
behaviour
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is primarily the result of a
person
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's upbringing,
education
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, and living conditions. Those who
support
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the genetic theory argue that some individuals may inherit personality traits
such
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as aggression, impulsiveness, or poor emotional control, which could increase the likelihood of engaging in criminal activities.
According to
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this
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view, these inherited characteristics make certain
people
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more prone to violence or antisocial
behaviour
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than others. Supporters
also
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point to scientific research suggesting that
genetics
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can influence human
behaviour
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to some extent.
However
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, possessing these traits does not necessarily mean that a
person
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will become a criminal.
On the other hand
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, many
people
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believe that
crime
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is largely influenced by external circumstances. Poverty, unemployment, lack of
education
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, family violence, substance abuse, and negative peer pressure often push individuals towards illegal activities. Children who grow up in unstable families or
crime
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-ridden neighbourhoods may consider criminal
behaviour
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to be normal because of the environment in which they are raised.
For example
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, a teenager who lacks educational opportunities and is surrounded by gangs is more likely to become involved in criminal activities than someone raised in a stable and supportive environment. In my opinion, environmental factors play a much greater role than
genetics
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in determining whether a
person
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becomes a criminal. Even if someone has inherited aggressive tendencies, proper parenting, quality
education
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, counselling, and positive social
support
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can help them develop into responsible citizens.
Likewise
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, many
people
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with no genetic predisposition to violence may still commit crimes if they experience severe social or economic hardship.
Therefore
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, governments should focus on improving
education
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, reducing poverty, and strengthening family and community
support
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systems to prevent
crime
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. In conclusion,
although
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genetics
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may influence certain aspects of personality, I believe that criminal
behaviour
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is mainly shaped by social and environmental circumstances. By addressing the root causes of
crime
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through
education
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, employment opportunities, and community
support
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, society can reduce criminal
behaviour
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more effectively than by focusing solely on genetic factors.

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task response
Add one more clear example to make your ideas stronger.
task response
You discuss both sides well, but you can explain the gene side a little more deeply.
coherence and cohesion
Use a few more linking words between ideas to make the flow even smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Some points are clear, but one or two sentences could be shorter and simpler for easier reading.
task response
You answer all parts of the task and give your own opinion clearly.
task response
Your main ideas are clear and easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a strong structure with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph stays on one main idea, which helps the reader follow your writing.
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