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Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people think is better for children to be teached at home. Others disagree. Discuss the advantages of both and give your own opinion

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Some
peoplethink
Correct your spelling
people think
 that teaching
kids
Use synonyms
 at home is better than outsade other disagrees . Both have advantages. For eximpel teacheing
children
Use synonyms
 in homes is a more calming
way
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 .
Moreover
Linking Words
, I believe a school is a better
way
Use synonyms
for studying
Wrong verb form
to study
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. On one hand, teaching
kids
Use synonyms
 in school is the best
way
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 because it provides a better learning process.
First,
Linking Words
the people who teach in it have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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more experience in teaching.
In addition
Linking Words
, if
kids
Use synonyms
 didn't go out of their
lazy
Use the right word
comfort
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 zone, they wouldn't learn. The
resons
Correct your spelling
reasons
 for
that
Linking Words
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 in their
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the people who think that
children
Use synonyms
 who is teached at home have a more calming and steady
way
Use synonyms
 of learning. More for it,
children
Use synonyms
 don't feel well with Other
kids
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.
Also
Linking Words
, if a kid is
allos
Correct your spelling
allowed
 in front of their parents thay will not be in danger. In the
end
Add a comma
end,
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 I disagree with the people who think that
children
Use synonyms
 should be taught at home
,
Punctuation problem
.
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 That
because
Verb problem
is because
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 of the better learning expeirence and the ones who are taught
in their homes
Change preposition
at home
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 have a bad life.

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task response
Score: 5. You answer all parts, but your ideas need more detail. Say why home learning is calm, and why this helps a child learn.
task response
Give one clear example for each side. For example, at home a child can learn at their own speed. At school, a child can work with other children and learn from trained teachers.
task response
Do not say children taught at home “have a bad life”. This is too strong and is not shown. Say they may have less time with other children instead.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 5. Keep one main idea in each paragraph. Your first body paragraph is about school, and your second is about home; this is good. Add a short topic sentence to each.
coherence and cohesion
Some ideas stop too soon. For example, “The resons for that is in their” is not finished. Check that every sentence has a full idea.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple links to show cause: “This is because…”, “As a result…”, and “For this reason…”. This will make your ideas easier to follow.
task response
You give both sides: home teaching can be calm, and school can give better learning.
task response
Your own view is clear: you think school is better.
coherence and cohesion
You use a clear four-part plan: start, one side, the other side, and the end.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words such as “On one hand”, “On the other hand”, “Moreover”, and “In the end”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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