IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Introduction
The question of how best to accommodate growing populations in major metropolitan areas is a pressing urban challenge.
While
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 some argue that constructing high-rise apartment blocks is the most effective solution, I largely agree with
this
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 perspective, as it
maximizes
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maximises
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land
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 efficiency and stimulates economic activity, provided that
such
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 developments are managed sustainably.
Body paragraph 1
Primarily, vertical expansion is the most logical response to
land
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 scarcity. In densely populated cities, horizontal sprawl is often impossible without encroaching on green belts or agricultural
land
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. By building upwards, cities can house thousands of residents on a single footprint.
For instance
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, Manhattan in New York City
utilizes
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utilises
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 skyscrapers to accommodate millions, creating a vibrant, dense urban core that would
otherwise
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 require vastly more space.
This
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 density not only solves the housing crisis but
also
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 fosters a dynamic cityscape that can become an architectural landmark, attracting tourism and enhancing the city's global image.
Body paragraph 2
Furthermore
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, high-density housing drives local economies. Tall residential complexes create a concentrated consumer base, supporting local businesses, supermarkets, and service providers within walking distance.
Additionally
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, mixed-use towers often include commercial office spaces, generating significant municipal revenue through rents and taxes. Rotterdam exemplifies
this
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 success; its modern high-rises have
revitalized
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revitalised
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 the port area, attracting corporations and residents alike, thereby turning a once-industrial zone into a bustling economic hub.
Although
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 concerns regarding noise and congestion are valid, these can be mitigated through superior urban planning and soundproofing technologies, ensuring a high quality of life.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
while
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 building tall apartment blocks presents certain challenges, it remains the most viable strategy for providing sufficient housing in large cities. By
optimizing
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optimising
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land
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 use and
catalyzing
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catalysing
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 economic growth, vertical living offers a sustainable path forward for
urbanization
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urbanisation
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, transforming city skylines into efficient, thriving communities.

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task response
Score: 8. Your answer is strong and fully on topic. To reach 9, explain more clearly why tall blocks are better than other ways, such as building homes in smaller towns or improving transport from outside the city.
task response
Some points move away from the main aim of giving enough homes. For example, tourism, city image, office space, and tax money are less direct. Add more about how many people can live there, lower land use, and lower cost per home.
task response
Your examples are useful, but be careful with big claims. Say exactly how each example shows that tall homes give more housing.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 8. The order of ideas is easy to follow. However, the second body paragraph has several ideas at once: shops, offices, tax, Rotterdam, noise, and traffic. Split it into clearer parts or keep one main idea in each paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Use links naturally. You already do this well, but do not depend too much on formal link words. Clear topic sentences and direct links back to housing will make the flow even better.
coherence and cohesion
The last sentence is strong, but it could repeat the exact question more directly: tall apartment blocks are the best way to provide enough homes in large cities, when they are well planned.
task response
Your view is clear: you mostly agree, but you also show that good planning is needed.
task response
You give two main reasons: saving land and helping local business. Both are linked to the question.
task response
The examples of Manhattan and Rotterdam make your ideas more real and easier to understand.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear shape: opening, two main body parts, and a closing paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as “Primarily”, “Furthermore”, “For instance”, and “In conclusion” help the reader follow your points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • housing shortage = not enough homes for people
  • apartment block = a large building with many flats
  • high-rise building = a very tall building
  • limited land = not much land available
  • population growth = the number of people increases
  • urban spread = the city grows into outer areas
  • public transport = buses, trains, and metro systems
  • living conditions = the quality of daily life at home
  • city planning = the way a city is designed and managed
  • green space = parks and open natural areas
  • daily needs = things people need every day
  • costly land = land that is very expensive
  • mixed housing = different kinds of homes in one area
  • sense of community = the feeling of belonging with neighbors
  • traffic pressure = too many cars on the roads
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