IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Some people believe that the fittest and strongest individuals and teams always success in sports. Others think that success in sports depends on mental attitudes. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

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The success in sports can be a result of good
preperation
Correct your spelling
preparation
 mentally and physically. Some people believes its either one of them. Good fit and perfect
excerecises
Correct your spelling
exercises
 and boot camps can lead directly to winning. Some people
belives
Correct your spelling
believe
 that
only will
Correct word order
it will only
show examples
 take to the
championship
Use synonyms
. Others
belives
Correct subject-verb agreement
believe
show examples
 that
relax
Replace the word
relaxation
 and mond preperation as yoga
before
Punctuation problem
, before
show examples
 the
championship
Use synonyms
 will
leads
Wrong verb form
lead
show examples
 you there. In my opinion, giving yourself time to practice and prepare your inner peace
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the game
not
Punctuation problem
, not
show examples
 losing yourself to high
practice
Punctuation problem
practice,
show examples
 will lead you to the
championship
Use synonyms
.
Last
Linking Words
, each individual differs from another
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
 each has
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
 own way to get the
championship
Use synonyms
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 more likely to do what suits you.

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task response
Score: 5. Your main ideas are on the topic, but they are too short. Explain more clearly why strong bodies can help in sport and why the mind can help too.
task response
Give one simple example for each view. For example, a runner needs strong legs, but also needs to stay calm near the end of a race.
task response
Your own view is clear: both practice and inner peace matter. Say this in a stronger way and explain why one should not replace the other.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 5. Put one full idea in each paragraph. Start with body strength, then mental strength, then your own view.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple link words to show the flow: First, However, For example, In my view, and Finally.
coherence and cohesion
Some lines are not clear, such as “only will take to the championship.” Write the full idea: “They believe that physical strength alone can lead to a championship.”
coherence and cohesion
Your last paragraph repeats the idea of your view. Use it as a short ending that clearly says success needs both a fit body and a strong mind.
task response
You talk about both body training and mental strength. You also give your own view.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has clear short parts: an opening, two views, your view, and an ending.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • physical strength
  • fitness level
  • peak condition
  • stamina
  • endurance
  • body power
  • mental strength
  • positive attitude
  • self-control
  • strong will
  • team spirit
  • under pressure
  • recover quickly
  • keep focus
  • top-level sport
  • perform well
  • fight back
  • follow a plan
  • deciding factor
  • win important matches
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