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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The pictures show the process of making cherry jam. Describe the process

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The provided diagram illustrates the nine distinct stages involved in the commercial production of cherry jam.
Overall
Linking Words
, the process begins with the harvesting of raw
cherries
Use synonyms
 and culminates in the packaging of the final product. It can be broadly divided into three main phases
:
Punctuation problem
:
show examples
 harvesting, fruit preparation, and cooking and bottling.
Initially
Linking Words
, a mechanical shaker is used to dislodge the
cherries
Use synonyms
 onto a large sheet spread on the ground. The harvested fruit is
then
Linking Words
 collected and transported by truck to a processing plant. Upon arrival, unwanted debris like leaves and stems is discarded. The
cherries
Use synonyms
 are
subsequently
Linking Words
 washed as they move down a tiered ramp before a specialised machine uses a metal spike to remove their stones. Once pitted, the
cherries
Use synonyms
 are cooked in a large vat with added lemon juice, sugar, and pectin. After cooking, an expert inspects and tastes the jam to ensure quality. In the final stages, the approved product is mechanically dispensed into glass jars along a conveyor belt and labelled, rendering it ready for retail distribution.

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task response
Score: 9. This is a full and correct answer. To make it even safer, check that every small step in the picture is named exactly as shown.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 9. The ideas move in a natural order. Keep using clear time words, but do not use too many in one paragraph.
language note
Your word choice is strong, but the test also needs correct detail. Make sure words such as “spike”, “pectin”, and “labelled” match the picture.
task response
You describe all main steps, from picking the cherries to putting jam in jars.
task response
Your overview is clear. It shows the start, the end, and the three main parts of the work.
coherence and cohesion
The order is very clear. Words like “Initially”, “Once”, and “In the final stages” help the reader follow each step.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has one clear job, so the answer is easy to read.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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