Many customs and traditional ways of behaviors are no longer relevant to the modern life and no worth keeping. Do you agree or disagree?

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Many

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

and

customs

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that are based on

traditions

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are irrelevant today

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;

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therefore

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, they should no longer be followed.

Although

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I agree that certain

customs

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should be left behind in order to reach freedom and safety, some

traditions

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that aim to bring

people

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together are still useful. On the one hand, it would be a mistake if traditional behaviors are no longer preserved. Respect for elders, cultural identity and social unity are the most notable examples. Some

traditions

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teach young generations to care for others, especially their families,

while

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others encourage

people

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to value their history through festivals or arts that reflect it. They

also

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bring

neighbors

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neighbours

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, relatives and friends close together in times of need.

Such

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traditions

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make life generally easier and create lasting memories that

people

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can value for years.

On the other hand

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, some outdated

customs

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should be removed. One major reason is that it limits

people

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's choice of life path and blocks personal freedom. In some

traditions

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, females are not allowed to work in fields that

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according

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, according

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to their tradition

considered

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, are considered

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masculine.

As a result

Linking Words

, many women who had exceptional abilities and talents in different fields,

such

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as math, physics, chemistry and

languages

Punctuation problem

languages,

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chose other jobs. Exchange of opinions from different

people

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could have led to some innovations or discoveries, since everyone sees the world differently.

Secondly

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, it can be dangerous, since some

traditions

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involve some tribal rituals that hurt

people

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. Many tribes believed in some spiritual subjects in the past

and

Punctuation problem

, and

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they did rituals that aimed to please spiritual subjects, which

bring

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brought

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rain and

protect

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protected

show examples

them. In conclusion,

although

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some

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apply

show examples

traditions

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should no longer be followed, because they pose danger and limit

people

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in their lives, some

customs

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are still essential, since they educate

people

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to live peacefully and together.

musabekovaferuza50

Aug 1, 2026

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Overall score

Estimated score: 7. Your ideas are clear and your essay is well planned. To get a higher score, give more exact examples and explain them more fully.

Task response

Your answer agrees in part, and this is clear. But say more clearly in the first paragraph that you partly agree, not fully agree.

Task response

Some points need a more real example. For example, name one festival, art form, or old rule about women at work. This will make your ideas stronger.

Task response

The last example about tribal rituals is not fully explained. Say what the ritual is and why it harms people. Also, “spiritual subjects” is not clear; use “spirits” or “gods” if that is what you mean.

Coherence and cohesion

The order is good, but some long parts need clearer links. For example, after the point about women, explain more directly how this can stop new ideas and new work.

Coherence and cohesion

Use fewer repeated words, such as “traditions” and “people”. You can also use “customs”, “old ways”, “men and women”, or “the young”.

Coherence and cohesion

Make each main paragraph start with one clear idea. Then give one example and explain its result. This simple order will make your writing easier to follow.

Task response

You give a clear view: some old customs should stop, but good customs should stay.

Task response

You use good main ideas, such as freedom, safety, family, history, and people being together.

Coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and an ending.

Coherence and cohesion

You use linking words well, such as “On the one hand”, “On the other hand”, “As a result”, and “In conclusion”.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Many customs and traditional ways of behaviors are no longer relevant to the modern life and no worth keeping. Do you agree or disagree?

Topic: Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

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The use of social media, e.g. Facebook and Twitter, is replacing face-to-face contact for many people in everyday life. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that newspaper are the best way to learn about the news. However, others believe that they can learn the news more effectively through other media. Discuss both these news and give your own opinion.

There is no doubt that the evolution of technology has affected every aspect of our lives, while some would argue that this development has made people’s lives harder. I believe that it has actually eased our life in many forms.