Chilhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this and what are some possible solutions can be offered?

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Nowadays, Obesty is beeing a difficult global issue.

this

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essay will discuss several causes and practical solutions. First of all, the most reason is the avalabilty and affordability of junk

food

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. increasing the number of restaurants which they provide fast

food

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with cheap price like Burgur King, McDonald, and Pizza Hot,...etc. through several online aplications.

As a result

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chiled choose the cheaper and tasty

food

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regardlles the nutierates. That can be manegment across govermentes

for example

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: rising the tax for junk

food

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, limitation the number of resturant in each districts, conducting the amount of ingrrdiant like: fat, sugar, and salt.

However

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, reduction the awarness of communities about the forward sides effect of obesity. Hopefly, that can be contolled through uniteing health ministry and education ministry to provide several significal solutions for instanse: offer free sport club subscrition. In conclousion, kids obisity is becoming decayed problem that can be controll upon cooperation between the familis and different responsible sectors as are discussed.

saraaloufi0023

Aug 4, 2026

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Task response

Overall score: 5. Your ideas are on topic, but they need more detail. Explain why cheap fast food makes children gain weight, for example, because it has much fat, sugar, and salt and children may eat it often.

Task response

Make each solution clear and full. For example, say who should raise tax, how schools can help, and why free sport clubs may work. The idea about fewer restaurants is not fully explained.

Task response

Your second cause is not clear. Instead of "reduction the awareness", write: "Many parents and children do not know enough about the bad effects of obesity." Then give one clear example.

Coherence and cohesion

Use one main idea in each body paragraph. Paragraph 1 can be about fast food. Paragraph 2 can be about lack of knowledge. In each paragraph, use this order: main idea, explanation, example, solution.

Coherence and cohesion

Some links do not show the right relation. "However" is not needed at the start of paragraph 2 because you are adding another cause. Use "Another cause is..." instead.

Coherence and cohesion

Write clearer sentences. For example: "The government can raise taxes on junk food and limit the amount of fat, sugar, and salt in it." This is easier to follow than the long list in your first paragraph.

Coherence and cohesion

Your conclusion should repeat the two main causes and the key solutions in simple words. Do not add new ideas there.

Task response

You answer both parts: causes and solutions. You give clear main ideas: cheap fast food and low public awareness.

Task response

You use examples such as Burger King and McDonald's. These make your point easier to see.

Coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, two main parts, and a conclusion. This is a good basic plan.

Coherence and cohesion

You use linking words such as "First of all", "As a result", "However", and "In conclusion".

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

162 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

dietary habits
high-calorie
low-nutrient
sedentary lifestyle
video games
online entertainment
social media
physical activities
balanced diet
regular exercise
comprehensive health education
nutrition
health education programs
regulate
advertising
unhealthy food products
promoting healthy eating
perceptions
setting a good example
healthier food choices
outdoor activities
screen time

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Chilhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this and what are some possible solutions can be offered?

Write a letter telling your friend about your good news. - What is it - Why does it affect your life - Invite him/her over for celebration.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some people say that spending the national budget on soace exploration is a waste of resources. They insist that those funds should be spent on people living on earth. Do you agree or disagree?

Since it is so easy to reach a large audience on the internet, people have to be exceptionally talented to become famous these days. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?