Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on children. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on how children behave. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, television and computer games play a big role in

children

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's lives. Multiple

people

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believe that watching

violence

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affect on

children

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's minds.

While

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others think it does not affect them.

This

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essay will examine both sides and the way they think

Violence

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has a bad influence on the way

children

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behave.

First,

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watching that

violence

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at a young age makes them scared.

For example

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, they think they may face

violence

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too , like hurting them.

Moreover

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, they will be scared of their parents and friends.

Second,

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children

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may become depressed. Watching

this

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violence

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will make them accept the worst from other

people

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In addition

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, they will become lonely and prefer to be alone.

Finally

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, it may lead

children

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to be violent.

For example

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, they may copy what they watched.

Also

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, they may be angry all the time.

However

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, some

people

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think

violence

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does not have a bad influence on

children

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. Those

people

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think they will become stronger. They think that

children

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will learn how to defend themselves.

Moreover

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, it can prepare them for life. Other

people

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think that

violence

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does not affect

children

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. They believe that

children

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will not remember when they grow up.

Furthermore

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, they think that

children

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do not understand anything in life. Some

people

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are careless and irresponsible.

For example

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, they believe it is fine to make their

children

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watch whatever they want.

Moreover

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, they do not have awareness or knowledge. In conclusion, it is clear to see that some

people

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believe that

violence

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on television and computer games affect on

children

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badly.

However

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, others ignore or deny the bad influences. I strongly agree that

violence

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damages

children

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's lives.

alfred

Aug 10, 2026

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task response

Explain each view more fully. The second view says violence can make children stronger, but this idea needs a clearer reason and a real example.

task response

Give more specific examples. For example, describe a child who copies a game fight at school, or a child who learns that game violence is not real.

task response

Your own view is clear, but add it before the end too. Then show why you think the bad effects are stronger than the other view.

task response

Avoid ideas about parents being careless unless you clearly link them to the two views in the question. Keep the focus on how screen violence affects children.

coherence and cohesion

Make each paragraph focus on one main point. In the first body part, fear, sadness, and anger are three different points, so explain each one with a short reason or example.

coherence and cohesion

Use clearer topic sentences. For example: “People who worry about screen violence say that children may copy what they see.”

coherence and cohesion

Some links between ideas are not clear. “They will become stronger” and “children do not understand anything in life” need a clearer link to the claim that violence has no bad effect.

coherence and cohesion

Use fewer repeated words such as “violence”, “children”, and “think”. You can use “violent shows”, “games”, “young people”, and “this view” when the meaning is clear.

coherence and cohesion

Check sentence form in key lines. Write “watching violence affects children’s minds”, not “watching violence affect on children’s minds”. Write “has a bad effect on children”, not “affect on children badly”.

task response

You discuss both views and give your own view clearly at the end.

task response

Your main ideas are linked to the topic, such as fear, sadness, and copying violent acts.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and an ending.

coherence and cohesion

You use linking words such as “First”, “Moreover”, “However”, and “In conclusion” to show the order of ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on children. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on how children behave. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Crime rate, in most countries, is often higher in urban areas than in rural areas. Why do you think that is? What can be done to reduce the crime rate?

Some children spend time on their smartphones. Why this is? is it a positive or nagative development?

In some part of the world it is becoming increasingly popular to try to find out the history of their own family why you think people do this do you think it is a positive or negative development.

The availability of entertainment such as video games on handheld devices are harmful to individual and to the socity they live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?