Many criminals re-offended after they have been punished. Why do some people continue to commit crimes after they have been punished, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

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Numerous offenders commit
crime
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crimes
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even after imprisonment.
This
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scenario consistently repeats itself. There are precautions and measurements to be implemented to avoid its being happening again. I will discuss the actions that can be safely
practiced
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practised
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. Millions of people are
witness
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witnesses
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that some criminals are
tough minded
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tough-minded
and never restrain to offences. Their mentality is just stuck to
criminality's
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criminality
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. They are suffering
with
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from
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psychiatric problems.
For example
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, criminology is in their minds and by having so they get pleasure. I have seen in person life, a boy
that
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who
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started robbing people, and
being
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was
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imprisoned and
then
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realised by court
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released
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on bail. The next day he stole my bike that was parked in my garage
and
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, and
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i did
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I
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saw
on
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it on
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my
cctv
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CCTV
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. Once
i
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I
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confronted him, he accepted and said he got thrilled experience by doing so. To talk about their skills and experience. They haven't got any specific education or training to earn money from.
There's
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It's
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this
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is easy to commit
crime
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a crime
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and
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, and
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they earn easy money as they thought.
Obviously
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Obviously,
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this
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money comes with
price
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a price
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and
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, and
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that is
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punishment. Being caught again and
again
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again,
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they got
use
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used
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to it and never
hesitate
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hesitated
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to repeat it. To cure
this
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problem, they should
attended
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attend
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some psychological seminars, get socialised. From
government
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a government
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perspective,
make
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create
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employment opportunities for them so they
got
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get
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engaged.
A
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In a
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nutshell, criminals are psychologically ill
,
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;
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they need treatment. By having employment
opportunities
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opportunities,
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they can divert their mind from evil earnings to good
earning
Replace the word
earnings
.

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task response
Explain more than one clear reason. Do not say that all criminals are mentally ill. Many people return to crime because they cannot find work, have no safe home, use drugs, or return to the same bad friends.
task response
Make each answer point more fully clear. For each reason, say why it leads to crime. For each plan, say who will do it, how it will work, and why it can help.
task response
Your ideas about jobs and mental health care are useful, but add real steps. For example, prisons can give work skills, and local groups can help people find a job and a place to live after prison.
task response
Use a more formal example. The personal bike story is relevant, but it has many language problems and takes up too much space. A general example would be stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clear four-part plan: opening; reasons; measures; ending. Start each body part with one main idea, then explain it and give one example.
coherence and cohesion
Some parts are hard to follow because the sentences are not complete or the meaning is unclear. For example, “There’s this is easy to commit crime” can be changed to “They may think that crime is an easy way to get money.”
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words to show the order of ideas: “First”, “Also”, “As a result”, “For this reason”, and “In conclusion”.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid very short or unclear parts such as “To talk about their skills and experience” and “they should attended some psychological seminars, get socialised.” Write full sentences with one clear point.
task response
You answer both parts of the question. You give reasons for repeat crime and suggest help through work and mental health care.
task response
Your bike story is clear and helps show why one person may enjoy crime.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has an opening, body parts, and a short ending. The ending returns to your two main ideas.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words, such as “For example”, “Obviously”, and “From government perspective”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • re-offend
  • repeat offender
  • criminal record
  • serve a prison sentence
  • rehabilitation programme
  • reintegration into society
  • stable employment
  • vocational training
  • job skills
  • financial pressure
  • negative peer influence
  • drug and alcohol addiction
  • counselling services
  • mental health support
  • supervised release
  • community service
  • reduce reoffending rates
  • break the cycle of crime
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