IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people believe university education should be free for everyone. Others think students should pay tuition fees. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Introduction
There is an ongoing debate over whether university
education
Use synonyms
 should be free for everyone or whether
students
Use synonyms
 should pay tuition fees.
Although
Linking Words
 providing free higher
education
Use synonyms
 offers several advantages, I believe that
students
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 should contribute to the cost of their
education
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 for a number of reasons.
Body paragraph 1
Some people argue that the government should make university
education
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 free because it ensures equal opportunities for
students
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 with different financial backgrounds. Many talented
students
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 are unable to pursue higher
education
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due to
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 financial difficulties.
For example
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,
students
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 from rural areas may achieve excellent academic results but lack the financial resources to attend university.
As a result
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, free higher
education
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 allows these individuals to gain professional qualifications, which benefits not only the
students
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 themselves but
also
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 society as a whole.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, governments have limited
budget
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budgets
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 and need
allocate
Verb problem
to allocate
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 funds for several essential sectors, including healthcare, infrastructure, and public safety.
Requering
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Requiring
students
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 from wealthy families to pay
tution
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tuition
 fees
alloves
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allows
 the government
provide
Verb problem
to provide
show examples
fully
Replace the word
full
 scholarships for learners from
low income
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low-income
 families,
while
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 continuing to invest in other basic public services.
Conclusion
in
Capitalize the word
In
show examples
 conclusion,
while
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 providing totally free
education
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 for
every one
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everyone
 seems to be
benificial
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beneficial
 as it provides equal opportunities for
every one
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everyone
, I believe that
requering
Correct your spelling
requiring
 wealthy
students
Use synonyms
 to pay
tution
Correct your spelling
tuition
 fees is more logical, since it
alloves
Correct your spelling
allows
 to invest
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 several essential sectors
such
Linking Words
 as
, healthcare
Correct word order
healthcare,
show examples
 public safety and others.

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task response
Explain your own view in more detail. Say why a mixed system is fair: rich students pay, poor students get full help, and the state can still pay for other key needs.
task response
Add one more clear example for the second view. For instance, say that fee income can help pay for hospitals, roads, and police.
task response
Be more exact about “everyone”. Your view is not that all students should pay; it is that students who can pay should pay. State this clearly in the introduction and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Make the second body part flow more smoothly. Use: “On the other hand, governments have limited budgets. They must also fund healthcare, roads, and public safety. Therefore, students from rich families should pay fees.”
coherence and cohesion
Keep the same form for key words. Use “tuition fees”, “scholarships”, and “low-income families” in the same way each time.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion repeats the main view, which is good, but make it shorter and cleaner. Avoid adding a long list at the end.
task response
You discuss both sides and give a clear view. Your main idea is that free study can help poor students, but rich students should pay.
task response
The example of able students from rural areas makes the first view clear and real.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, two main body parts, and a conclusion. Words such as “For example”, “As a result”, and “On the other hand” help the reader follow your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Each body part has one main point, so the writing is easy to understand.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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