IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

More and more people are choosing to read ebooks as compared to paper books. Is it a positive or negative development.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
In recent
year
Check wording
years
show examples
,
people
Use synonyms
's
choosing to
Replace the word
choice of
books
Use synonyms
 has become a broad issue
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the general public. Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that more and more
people
Use synonyms
 are choosing to read ebooks as compared to paper
books
Use synonyms
In
Punctuation problem
. In
show examples
this
Linking Words
 essay, I am going to share my
opinion
Use synonyms
 to discuss the positive and negative
of
Check wording
aspects of
show examples
people
Use synonyms
's health.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand,
people
Use synonyms
's
choosing to
Replace the word
choice of
books
Use synonyms
many
Verb problem
is many
show examples
 positive. Here are some reasons to support
this
Linking Words
 idea.
Firstly
Linking Words
, I think that
people
Use synonyms
's
choosing to
Replace the word
choice of
books
Use synonyms
 is necessary because for me it
is it help
Verb problem
helps
show examples
 develop new
skill
Check wording
skills
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, I believe that
meaning
Wrong verb form
means
show examples
 because in my
Use synonyms
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 it is my work.
Body paragraph 2
On the
orther
Correct your spelling
other
 hand,
people
Use synonyms
's choosing to
books
Use synonyms
many
Verb problem
are many
show examples
 negative. Here are some reasons to support
this
Linking Words
 idea.
Firstly
Linking Words
, I think that
people
Use synonyms
's choosing
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
books
Use synonyms
 is unnecessary because for me it is it make waste of time.
Secondly
Linking Words
, I believe that unsuitable because
in
Punctuation problem
, in
show examples
 my
Use synonyms
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 it is not good.
Conclusion
To sum up
Linking Words
, every coin has two sides.
People
Use synonyms
 have to think of both
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
 of the
promble
Correct your spelling
problem
. In my
opinion
Use synonyms
, I support the first idea that more and more
people
Use synonyms
 are choosing to read ebooks as compared to paper
books
Use synonyms
.
.
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
People
Use synonyms
 should have
further
Linking Words
 consideration
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 issue.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task response
Answer the main question clearly: say if ebooks are a positive or negative change, and keep this view all through the essay.
Task response
Write about ebooks and paper books, not only about people's health. Explain real good points, such as low cost, easy use, and less paper, or bad points, such as eye pain and less focus.
Task response
Make each main idea clear. Do not write “it is my work” or “it is not good” without saying what “it” means and why it matters.
Task response
Add simple, real examples. For example, a student can carry many ebooks on one phone or tablet instead of many heavy paper books.
Coherence and cohesion
Use a clear four-part plan: give your view, explain one good or bad point, explain a second point, then end with your view again.
Coherence and cohesion
Keep one main idea in each body part. At present, the points are very short and do not link well to the topic.
Coherence and cohesion
Use link words with care: “First”, “Also”, “However”, “For example”, and “As a result”. Then explain each point in two or three full sentences.
Coherence and cohesion
Make the last part match your view. You say there are two sides, but you should state more clearly why the good side is stronger.
Task response
You give a clear final view: you support the move from paper books to ebooks.
Task response
You try to discuss both the good and bad sides of the topic.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a beginning, two main parts, and an ending.
Coherence and cohesion
You use basic link words such as “On the one hand”, “On the other hand”, and “To sum up”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: