IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The plans below show a college café before it was redesigned and how it looks now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Introduction
The plan depicts how a college cafeteria was in the past and how it has been redesigned now.
Body paragraph 1
Overall
Linking Words
, the café still has the old design with the same rooms.
However
Linking Words
, a new outdoor place was introduced to accommodate more students.
Body paragraph 2
Firstly
Linking Words
, the cantin open a new place with a barbecue and outdoor seating , including five tables ,
whereas
Linking Words
 the other seats are indoors.
As a result
Linking Words
, they create two new doors to connect the rooms.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the indoor kitchen is still the same apart from the fact that the serving area was changed to include hot meals.
Conclusion
Secondly
Linking Words
, many things have changed in the principal area. Recycling bins have been introduced , taking up much more space than the previous bins. Nearby the bins are the toilets. On the other side of the room, the designer created a Salad bar.
Finally
Linking Words
, the staff dining room has been changed into a coffee bar and a takeaway food.

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task response
Give a clearer overall view of the main changes. Say that new eating areas and food services were added, while the kitchen and toilets stayed in the same place.
task response
Check that every change is correct and easy to understand. Explain where the new doors are and how the outdoor area is linked to the café.
task response
Use more exact details from the plans, such as the number of tables and the new salad bar, coffee bar, and take-away food area.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clear order: start with the old plan and new plan in general, then describe the outdoor area, and then the main indoor area.
coherence and cohesion
Make links between ideas more clear. Use words such as "while", "in contrast", "next to", and "on the other side" only when the place or change is clear.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid unclear words such as "they" and "the designer". Name the place or feature again, for example, "the café added two doors".
coherence and cohesion
Write full and clear sentences. For example, change "the cantin open" to "the cafeteria has opened" and remove spaces before commas.
task response
You identify several key changes, including the outdoor seating, barbecue, salad bar, coffee bar, and take-away food.
task response
You also notice that the kitchen did not change much and that the serving area now has hot meals.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a short opening and an overall statement, followed by two body parts.
coherence and cohesion
You use place words such as "nearby" and "on the other side" to help the reader follow the plan.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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