IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

The picture below shows the museum's plant in 1998 and after some changes were made in 2008.

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Introduction
The maps illustrate the changes made to the layout of a
museum
Use synonyms
 between 1998 and 2008.
Body paragraph 1
Overall
Linking Words
, the
museum
Use synonyms
 underwent a substantial reconfiguration over the ten-year period, with the internal arrangement of several facilities being considerably altered and a number of new amenities being incorporated. Despite these extensive modifications,
however
Linking Words
, the café and the ticket entrance and exit remained broadly unchanged in terms of their location.
Body paragraph 2
In 1998, a centrally positioned
garden
Use synonyms
 constituted the principal feature of the
museum
Use synonyms
’s layout, with the café situated immediately behind it. The permanent
exhibition
Use synonyms
 rooms occupied the two opposing corners at the ends of the
garden
Use synonyms
. Along the lower section of the premises, a ticket office was positioned adjacent to a shop, a temporary
exhibition
Use synonyms
 room, a toilet and a designated area for storing bags. Collectively, these facilities occupied much of the space along the southern edge of the
museum
Use synonyms
.
Conclusion
By 2008, the original configuration had been substantially transformed. The central
garden
Use synonyms
 was retained but was enhanced with additional amenities, most notably fountains and a designated café seating area. The permanent
exhibition
Use synonyms
 rooms continued to occupy the right-hand side of the premises, effectively retaining their position along the eastern edge,
whereas
Linking Words
 the
exhibition
Use synonyms
 facility on the left-hand side was removed altogether. The space formerly occupied by the temporary
exhibition
Use synonyms
 room was
subsequently
Linking Words
 repurposed to accommodate the shop and the bag-and-coat storage facilities.
Elsewhere
Linking Words
, the WC was relocated to a position immediately adjacent to the café,
while
Linking Words
 the temporary
exhibition
Use synonyms
 room itself was transferred to the western side of the
garden
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, a restaurant was introduced in the upper corner of the
museum
Use synonyms
, representing one of the most notable additions to the revised layout.

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task response
Give a more exact account of every main change. In particular, check whether the two permanent exhibition rooms both stayed on the right, as this point is not fully clear in your report.
task response
Use the map words exactly. For example, say where each room moved from and where it moved to. This will make the report more complete and safe.
coherence and cohesion
Your order is clear: you first describe the old plan and then the new plan. To make it even easier to follow, group changes by area, such as the garden, the left side, and the bottom side.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are very long. Split them into two shorter sentences when you list many places. This will help the reader follow each change.
task response
You give a clear main view of the changes and point out that the cafe, ticket area, and exit stayed in the same place.
task response
You cover many key changes, including the new restaurant, the moved WC, the new temporary exhibition room, and the added garden features.
coherence and cohesion
The report has a strong structure, with an opening, a clear overview, a 1998 paragraph, and a 2008 paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words such as “By 2008”, “whereas”, and “Elsewhere” help the ideas move in a clear way.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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