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Writing Samples
Band 7

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

7.0 / 9
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Introduction
Science
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 has always been a driving force behind the progress of humanity, and I wholeheartedly agree that its most important aim should be to improve
people
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's
lives
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. From the moment the first tools were crafted to make hunting and gathering easier,
science
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 has been dedicated to enhancing the
quality
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 of human existence.
Body paragraph 1
One of the most evident ways
science
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 has improved
lives
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 is through medical advancements. In the past, diseases like smallpox and polio were rampant, causing widespread death and disability.
However
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, through scientific
research
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, vaccines were developed. Smallpox,
for instance
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, has been eradicated globally, saving countless
lives
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.
This
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 is a testament to how
science
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 can directly address life-threatening issues and improve the well-being of
people
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. In modern times,
research
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 into cancer treatments is ongoing, and each new discovery, whether it's a more effective chemotherapy drug or a revolutionary immunotherapy technique, gives hope to patients and their families, improving their
quality
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 of life even in the face of a serious illness.
Body paragraph 2
Another area where
science
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 has had a profound impact on
people
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's
lives
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 is in technology. The invention of the internet, a result of scientific and technological
research
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, has transformed the way we communicate, access information, and conduct business.
People
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 from remote areas can now connect with the world, access educational resources, and find job opportunities.
For example
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, students in rural villages can take online courses from top universities around the world, expanding their knowledge and future prospects.
This
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 connectivity has
also
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 improved the
lives
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 of the elderly, who can now stay in touch with their families living far away through video calls.
Body paragraph 3
Moreover
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,
science
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 has played a key role in environmental protection, which in turn improves
people
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's
lives
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. Scientists study climate change and develop solutions to mitigate its effects. Renewable energy sources,
such
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 as solar and wind power, are being developed and implemented, reducing our reliance on fossil fuels and improving air
quality
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. Cleaner air means fewer respiratory diseases, directly benefiting the health of the population.
Additionally
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, sustainable farming practices, developed through scientific
research
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, ensure food security
while
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 protecting the environment, which is essential for the well-being of current and future generations.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
science
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 has an immense potential to improve
people
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's
lives
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, and making
this
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 its primary goal is not only logical but
also
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 necessary. By focusing on medical, technological, and environmental advancements,
science
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 can continue to enhance the
quality
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 of life for all.

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Task response
Make your view a little more balanced. You agree fully, but you could briefly say that some science may not help people at once. Then explain why helping people should still come first.
Task response
Your main ideas are clear. To make them stronger, add one short point about how science should be used with care, for example when new tools may harm people or the earth.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear order: health, technology, then the earth. Keep this good plan, but make the links between each main part a little more direct.
Coherence and cohesion
Some parts have long sentences with many ideas. Use more short sentences in places so the reader can follow each point more easily.
Task response
You answer the question clearly from the start and keep the same view in all parts of the essay.
Task response
You use good real examples, such as smallpox, polio, online study, and clean energy. These make your ideas easy to understand.
Coherence and cohesion
Each main part has one clear topic, an explanation, and an example. This makes the essay easy to follow.
Coherence and cohesion
The first and last parts clearly state your view, and the last part brings your main ideas together well.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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