IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Access to clean water is a basic human right. Therefore every home should have a water supply that is provided free of charge. Do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction
In
this
Linking Words
 modern age, it is needless to say how essential
water
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 is in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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. Everyone deserves to drink purified
water
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 without any cost. It is necessary for all houses to possess a source of discontaminated
water
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. I strongly advocate
this
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 statement
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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this
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 essay will explain the reasons why with the relevant examples.
Body paragraph 1
First and foremost, the consequences of contaminated
water
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 are huge among
people
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, especially those living in shocking conditions
such
Linking Words
 as remote areas of Africa and Gaza. Every year, almost 10,000
people
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are suffering
Wrong verb form
suffer
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 from gastrointestinal diseases
such
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 as diarrhoea and cholera, etc. It can lead to negative impacts on human productivity as
people
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 spend most of their time in clinics and hospitals. Since
water
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-borne diseases are quite infectious,
it
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they
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 can result in a knock-on effect on
people
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.
Body paragraph 2
Another reason why clean
water
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 should be provided for free is the tangible benefits which could profit the whole community. As a saying
goes
Punctuation problem
goes,
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 "prevention is better than cure" , but for the preventive measures and massive health education in seriously affected areas,
people
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 would have suffered a lot more from
water
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-borne diseases.
Were
Correct word choice
If
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 governments and authoritative
people
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able
Verb problem
were able
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 to allocate the resources effectively, we could even eradicate all
illness
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illnesses
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 linked to unclean
water
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,
instead
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 of spending a large amount of money on treatment and rehabilitation. In
this
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 way, we can improve our standard of living as a whole world.
Conclusion
The idea of distributing free clean
water
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 strikes a
cord
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chord
show examples
 with me as it can boost our status and prevent unnecessary suffering. I believe we will have implemented
this
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 innovative scheme in the very near future.

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Task response
Make your main view more exact. You say all people should have clean water for free, but you do not clearly say if this means all water use, or only a basic amount for drinking, cooking, and washing. Explain this key point.
Task response
Give a fair reply to the other side. For example, free water for all use may lead to waste and may cost the state a lot. Then explain why a free basic supply is still the best plan.
Task response
Use more careful facts. The number about illness is not clearly linked to a place or source. You can use a simple, clear example instead: poor families may drink unsafe water when clean water is too costly.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and an end. To make the flow better, link each body part more directly to your main view about free water for every home.
Coherence and cohesion
Keep the focus on the same idea in each paragraph. The first body part is about unsafe water, while the second moves between health care, education, and state spending. Start each paragraph with one clear main point and then explain it.
Coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. Some links are not natural, such as “As a saying goes” and “Were governments...”. Use simple links like “For this reason”, “Also”, and “As a result”.
Coherence and cohesion
Make the last paragraph stronger. Restate your view and sum up your two reasons. Do not add a new idea about a future plan at the end.
Task response
You clearly state your view in the first paragraph and stay mostly on the side of free clean water.
Task response
You give two useful reasons: clean water can stop illness, and it can lower health costs for the wider group.
Coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow because it uses clear paragraph breaks and clear signposts such as “First and foremost” and “Another reason”.
Coherence and cohesion
The opening and closing paragraphs both connect to the main topic, so the whole answer has a clear shape.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • basic
  • human
  • right
  • water
  • supply
  • provided
  • free
  • charge
  • agree
  • disagree
  • health
  • essential
  • sick
  • diseases
  • supports
  • education
  • children
  • focus
  • learning
  • searching
  • better
  • futures
  • reduce
  • poverty
  • families
  • save
  • money
  • spend
  • important
  • needs
  • promote
  • equality
  • chance
  • access
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